STRANGE XMAS STORIES

Since my DINING WITH ALIENS post seemed to garner a huge degree of popularity, I will share with the rest of my faithful readers (all ten of 'em, heh) some other personal stories.

This Xmas was semi-uneventful. Nobody really shrieked at one another. My brother-in-law (herein referred to as my BIL) still feels obliged to debate/discuss/pontificate about the possibility of possessing a soul, and my (little) sister felt obliged to share her proof of an afterlife.

It's difficult at best to have a debate with him, as I've noted before, he tends to get more than a little sloshed at our family functions. At one juncture, he tried to do the old shift-the-burden-of-proof nonsense on me, to paraphrase, "You have to be able to prove that gawd doesn't exist." This is what I told him:
"I'm NOT going to disprove something you can't prove exists." (Yeesh, why can't people see the essential logical disconnect in a statement like that?).

Little sis told an interesting story (problem is, she told it SEVERAL times, as if my short-term memory's shot: that bugs me, it does. Maybe it's because of my BIL - he tends to go on tangents, while all the while she's nagging him to listen to her. We call them Mr. and Mrs. Constanza on occasion).

A little back story, for the folks who don't know:
About nineteen years ago, little sis (herein referred to as LS) got pregnant. My folks were in a bit of a funk about that, seeing as BIL and LS were cohabiting but unmarried. The night BIL proposed (in front of the whole family sans me), is the night that my father passed on (in his sleep).

That established, fast forward to the present:
The story as I heard it, was that LS, right after she got home from the hospital, claims that she actually saw a vision of my deceased father bending over my niece's crib.

A view words about the recipient of said vision are in order.
She's not a church-goer. Her knowledge of the bible is about below average for the cafe Christian. She's not one of those folks that sees hidden divine mysteries in the falling of a leaf or a shooting star. She's made efforts in the past to squelch any and all discussion about religion. She'd rather blather endlessly about some minor confrontation she had at the grocery store than engage in philosophical debate. I doubt she's seen the inside of a church outside of family funerals or my niece's baptism (and therein lies a tale, for another day).

The old saying is this: "Small minds discuss people, mediocre minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas." Sadly, she falls in the first category.

I made the effort to explain this phenomenon, but I was hesitant: she said something that touches the Great Debate - "That was my moment, and I don't want anyone to take it away."

So I asked her, if my niece's birth had an association with my dad's death. Of course it did. I then explained (the short version: she's a good heart, but not very intellectual), that familiarity is an association with neural pathways. Emotions elicit chemical responses, forming neural pathways via the hypothalamus, etc. Pretty much a "Yessss...?" response. I of course laid out the disclaimer that I am neither biologist nor psychologist (truth is, I was a little buzzed meself). I could've gone on about the bicameral mind, temporal lobe epilepsy, and a little research (the next day) has shown me that postpartnum depression can prompt a psychotic episode (varying between minor to major), but I am loathe to broach it on that level, as most people bridle when you try telling them they had a mental breakdown of some sort. ("What?!? My epiphany was because I was NUTS!?!?! [expletive deleted] YOU!")

And the truth is, occasionally (approximately twice a year) I have odd dreams, where my deceased father shows up, and some back story (in the dream itself) is that he didn't really die, he just went elsewhere for said amount of years - it's all strange, strange, strange.

Any thoughtful input, analysis, or criticism is welcomed on this one.

Now for a bit of humor.

Some years ago, my (older) sis had a boyfriend, who I referred to as a bro-in-law (he's now since gone - a more recent xmas incident was the catalyst for their splitting up). Older sis is a major league prude. So I gave him an utterly wild gift. Prior to opening it, I told him: "Remember: you always have options."

When he opened it, he turned a deep crimson, blushing. Normally, he was unflappable.

It was an inflatable love-doll. Not just any model, though: it was the 'perfect date'. Inflated, it stood at waist heighth (guess where the mouth was?), with a flat surface on the head to rest your drink on.

Needless to say, all the menfolk thought it hilarious. The womanfolk were...not amused. Older sis shrieked "That's completely inappropriate!", and the pictures in the xmas album have a number of shocked looks. My two BILs blew it up and had a field day (in a manner of speaking).

My nephew (he was about 6 or 7 then) began to play with it however. So I had to go hide the damn thing.

No word of a lie, squire. I have photographic documentation of the event (available upon request).

See? I was quite irreverent BEFORE I 'converted' to atheism.

Hmmmm...

Till the next post, then.