Cross posted at the Atheist Oasis
Sweet Zombie Jesus! –Prof. Farnsworth from Futurama
Yes, it’s that time of year again, when zombies and rabbits combine to make thanatophobia more palatable to the unwashed masses.
And yes, Jesus was, by the strictest definition of the word, a zombie.
That is to say, that a zombie is:
(Haitian Creole: zonbi; North Mbundu: nzumbe) an animated corpse brought back to life by mystical means, such as witchcraft. The term is often figuratively applied to describe a hypnotized person bereft of consciousness and self-awareness, yet ambulant and able to respond to surrounding stimuli. Since the late 19th century, zombies have acquired notable popularity, especially in North American and European folklore.
The brain-eating nonsense came later. The question to that, is: why on earth would they eat anything? Bodily fluids have ceased to flow – by what logic would these shambling monstrosities even be hungry? No reason, it just makes a better story.
An amusing aside (apropos of very little but the topic itself), I recall many years ago reading about Solomon Kane, a Robert E. Howard character, who battled hordes of zombies, until his African shaman friend N’Longa summoned vultures to save him.
Which begs the next question: why aren’t birds, or other carrion feeders swarming over these things? Or insect life?
But I digress.
And the unanswerable question (unanswered because it cannot possibly make any sense), is how an immortal being can sacrifice himself to himself to correct the flaw built into the alleged creation?
Ridiculous is the word for it. And I’m being kind.
Anyways, I’ll leave you all with a clip of one of my all-time favorite comics, Sam Kinison, who talks about how crazy it might have been.
Enjoy your bunny day, and make sure to take advantage of all the post-Easter chocolate sales.
Till the next post, then.
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