biblioblography

Because Sometimes The UN Gets It Right

2012-01-29T13:17:00.001-08:00

I don’t much respect for the U.N – they pander way too much to religion, and they buckle every time the U.S howls at at the moon.

This time, however, they’re on the money:

African Union: Ban Ki-moon urges respect for gay rights

United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki-moon has urged African leaders to respect gay rights.

Discrimination based on sexual orientation had been ignored or even sanctioned by many states for too long, Mr Ban told an African Union summit.

Homosexuality is illegal in many African countries - a situation which has drawn increasing criticism from activists and the West.

Mr Ban also said the Arab Spring proved leaders "must listen to their people".

The only issue with that last sentence, is that they do, in some ways. The problem there, is that all of the Big 3 specifically prohibit homosexual behavior (although a lot of high-ranking Muslims seem to indulge in a different pastime, pederasty, regardless).

Someone should probably inform Nigerian, as of last month, a bunch of discriminatory fuckwads if ever there were any:

Homosexual acts are already illegal in Nigeria. But for its lawmakers that doesn't appear to be categorical enough.

"This is to be pro-active so no-one catches us unaware," says Senator Ahmed Lawan, one of the backers for new legislation that would further criminalise Nigeria's gay community.

The Prohibition of Same-Sex Marriage Bill last week sailed unopposed through the Senate - the country's highest chamber.

Under the new bill, same-sex couples entering into either marriage or cohabitation would face jail terms of up to 14 years.

Those "witnessing" or "abetting" such relationships would also face custodial sentences, and groups that advocate for gay and lesbian rights could also be penalised.

'You are evil'

The lawmakers say they are simply reflecting the prevailing values of Nigerian society.

"We are protecting humanity and family values, in fact, we are protecting civilization in its entirety," Mr Lawan tells the BBC from his office in the capital, Abuja.

"Should we allow for indiscriminate same-sex marriage, very soon the population of this world would diminish."

Ahmed Lawan says both Muslims and Christians are opposed to same sex marriage

Far from being on the extreme fringe, the senator's views are moderate compared with some of his peers.

During the third reading of the bill, one northern politician said he believed the punishment should be death.

That was voted down, but at a tense public hearing at the National Assembly activists who spoke against the legislation were jeered and heckled.

"They said: 'You are evil, you are a devil, and if you were my brother you'd deserve to be killed,'" says John Adeniyi, one of those brave enough to speak out.

"And it made me feel like the world is not a place worth being in."

This has been mentioned before, but it bears repeating: the only real opposition to gay marriage is the religious one. It is one of the many, MANY reasons we atheists are anti-religion. It teaches people that discrimination is fine; that their off-ramp is the only exit; that slaughter and mayhem are wrong, but only if not sanctioned; that spirits dwell on the fringes of darkness, waiting to pounce, to gobble us up or lead us down to the Malebolge of depravity; and of course, that we are all slaves to the words of ghosts that never were.

Religion: getting more people killed for nothing.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–HISHE

2012-01-25T06:53:00.001-08:00

My roommate turned me on to these – How It Should Have Ended is an hysterical send-off on popular movies.

How the Lord Of The Rings Should’ve Ended:

And how Captain America Should Have Ended:

Enjoy.

Brain Damage–Is Religion Wrecking People’s Thinking?

2012-01-22T00:16:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis
(Hat tip to Religion Gone Crazy for this)

There's someone in my head but it's not me.
And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear
You shout and no one seems to hear
And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes
I'll see you on the dark side of the moon – Pink Floyd, Brain Damage

The auto-response on this from the religious would be, “oh, wait, that’s just a video, it doesn’t count”. Countless excuses will ensue, mixed in deeply with cries of ‘persecution!’, accusations of confirmation bias, pathetic excuses, you know the drill.

Regardless, Scientific American released this article mid-2011, titled:

Religious Experiences Shrink Part of the Brain

The article, “Religious factors and hippocampal atrophy in late life,” by Amy Owen and colleagues at Duke University represents an important advance in our growing understanding of the relationship between the brain and religion. The study, published March 30 in PLoS One, showed greater atrophy in the hippocampus in individuals who identify with specific religious groups as well as those with no religious affiliation. It is a surprising result, given that many prior studies have shown religion to have potentially beneficial effects on brain function, anxiety, and depression.

A number of studies have evaluated the acute effects of religious practices, such as meditation and prayer, on the human brain. A smaller number of studies have evaluated the longer term effects of religion on the brain. Such studies, like the present one, have focused on differences in brain volume or brain function in those people heavily engaged in meditation or spiritual practices compared to those who are not. And an even fewer number of studies have explored the longitudinal effects of doing meditation or spiritual practices by evaluating subjects at two different time points.

In this study, Owen et al. used MRI to measure the volume of the hippocampus, a central structure of the limbic system that is involved in emotion as well as in memory formation. They evaluated the MRIs of 268 men and women aged 58 and over, who were originally recruited for the NeuroCognitive Outcomes of Depression in the Elderly study, but who also answered several questions regarding their religious beliefs and affiliation. The study by Owen et al. is unique in that it focuses specifically on religious individuals compared to non-religious individuals. This study also broke down these individuals into those who are born again or who have had life-changing religious experiences.

The results showed significantly greater hippocampal atrophy in individuals reporting a life-changing religious experience. In addition, they found significantly greater hippocampal atrophy among born-again Protestants, Catholics, and those with no religious affiliation, compared with Protestants not identifying as born-again.

For those of you unfamiliar with the hippocampus:

The hippocampus is a major component of the brains of humans and other vertebrates. It belongs to the limbic system and plays important roles in the consolidation of information from short-term memory to long-term memory and spatial navigation. Humans and other mammals have two hippocampi, one in each side of the brain. The hippocampus is closely associated with the cerebral cortex, and in primates is located in the medial temporal lobe, underneath the cortical surface. It contains two main interlocking parts: Ammon's horn and the dentate gyrus.

This makes for interesting reading:

Although it had historical precursors, this idea derived its main impetus from a famous report by Scoville and Brenda Milner describing the results of surgical destruction of the hippocampus (in an attempt to relieve epileptic seizures), in a patient named Henry Gustav Molaison, known until his death in 2008 as H.M. The unexpected outcome of the surgery was severe anterograde and partial retrograde amnesia: H.M. was unable to form new episodic memories after his surgery and could not remember any events that occurred just before his surgery, but retained memories for things that happened years earlier, such as his childhood. This case produced such enormous interest that H.M. reportedly became the most intensively studied medical subject in history.

This would go a long way towards explaining much of the flatline behavior of the true believer.

It also lends new meaning to the term, ‘shrinkage’.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–Dwight Schrute

2012-01-18T06:17:00.001-08:00

Mostly, I don’t watch The Office anymore. But when I do, the most brilliant comic moments are from the character Dwight Schrute (played by the ever-hilarious Rainn Wilson).

And then there’s the obligatory montage:

Enjoy.

And The Twit Of The Year Race Is On! (Or Rather, The Republican Presidential Nomination)

2012-01-15T01:44:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

And what a line-up it’s been!

The idiots have lined up, and it’s a cross between a spit-take, a face palm, a headdesk, and picking one’s metaphorical jaw off the floor.

We have the Right Honorable Newt Gingrich, he of the many wives, who right out of the gate, announced that he would dispatch US Marshals to arrest ‘activist judges’ Even his Republican peers (none of whom can rightfully called ‘rational’ by any standard) found this to be a tad…nuts. The likelihood of his getting the nomination is now out. (Phew!)

Sadly, the remainder is still scary enough. Rick Santorum alone is enough to eyeball a high-power rifle. This guy is seriously nuts. He’s the epitome of everything America is not. He’s intolerant of gay rights: his view of abortion is frighteningly anachronistic; he keeps using the code words ‘activist judges’ (a phrase that instills fear in conspiracy theorists galore, but translates to ‘not popular with the conservative crazies’). I don’t even need to cite anything more than his web page.

I’ve laid into Rick Perry before: his status as a fucknut changeth not.

Ron Paul is a mixed bag of nuts: he thinks that ‘life begins at conception’, has the prevalent asinine dictate against abortion (touting himself as ‘an unshakable foe’), also thinks there’s a war against religion going on, and proclaims global warming a hoax. What makes more moderate Republicans (almost an oxymoron, there) want to vote for him is that he actually sounds more rational than the rest of the monkeys in the zoo.

At least Ms. Monkey is off the ticket – never thought I’d ever be booing a woman running for president, but there you have it.

The last two are the least worrisome, which is weird, because they’re both Mormon.

Huntsman seems nearly intelligent – he doesn’t boo science or substitute crazy for reality (well, at least mostly). He doesn’t deny global warming, or evolution.

Romney is still an anti-woman’s choice, but is at least willing to change his opinion. Problem is, it’s usually way off into right field.

We can only hope that Obama gets re-elected. While he hasn’t been the best president ever, he still rates well above the baboons that ride the GOP elephant.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Twofer–The Family Guy’s Take On Religion

2012-01-10T20:42:00.001-08:00

If you’re looking for an MMA-style takedown on religion chock full of laughs, one has to look no further than the Family Guy.

Guns and religious history:

And the world according to Carl Sagan (for rednecks):

Funny as these both may be, the scary part is that they’re not too far from the truth.

Enjoy.

The Madness Of Muslim–The Religion Of Peace Claims More Lives

2012-01-08T01:24:00.001-08:00

(Hat tip to Pharyngula at FreeThought Blogs)

Nigeria Christians hit by fresh Islamist attacks

Nigeria has been hit by a fresh wave of violence apparently targeting the country's Christian communities.

At least 17 people were killed in Mubi in Adamawa state as gunmen opened fire in a town hall where members of the Christian Igbo group were meeting.

There were also reports of a deadly attack in Adamawa's capital, Yola.

The Islamist Boko Haram group said it had carried out the attack in Mubi and another in Gombe on Thursday night in which at least six people died.

The group has staged numerous attacks in northern and central areas in recent months - on Christmas Day it attacked a church near the capital, Abuja, killing dozens of people.

One Boko Haram faction has warned all southerners - who are mostly Christian and animist - to leave the mainly Muslim north of Nigeria.

Adamawa state borders Borno state, where Boko Haram emerged.

Last week President Goodluck Jonathan declared a state of emergency in Yobe and Borno states, as well as Plateau state in central Nigeria and Niger state in the west, following a surge in ethnic and sectarian violence.

But the pace of attacks has increased and he must now consider whether to extend the state of emergency into other states and beef up the military presence in the north in response, says the BBC's Mark Lobel in Lagos.

Meanwhile, the government is also facing the bleak prospect of a general strike in two days' time amid popular fury over its removal of a fuel subsidy which has seen fuel prices double for ordinary Nigerians.

As I have stated previously, Islam (which I have dubbed Ass-lame) seems to inspire more barbarism than the other two of the Big Mono-Three. We have all heard the apologia behind this: Islam once went through a golden age, it contributed to western civilization in various disciplines, some of the greatest minds of the Middle Ages were of the Islamic faith.

This, however, is a poor excuse for the current behavior of its constituents. Islam is a rape culture: it is a brutal boot used to grind the poor beneath into the ground: it bypasses anything vaguely resembling civilized action: it gives excuse to misogyny and promotes patriarchal bullshit.

It is, in short, YAUA (Yet Another Useless Anachronism). The sooner this nonsense it gone, the better off the species will be.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny–MadTV Gets The Psychic Thing Spot on…

2012-01-03T20:13:00.001-08:00

Is this a bull's-eye, or what?

Enjoy.

Tuesday Twofer–Children’s Hospital

2011-12-28T21:21:00.001-08:00

I just discovered this recently – it’s a very brief show on Adultswim, and it’s…well, it’s incredibly random humor. Sort of a Scrubs on mescaline.

An interview with Dr. Maestro gives you a good idea how odd the show is.

And here is (I kid you not) an entire episode. It’s a fast show. One of the funnier aspects, is that it always starts with “Previously, on Children’s Hospital”, and the clips from the last show never ever happened.

Enjoy.

It’s Starting To Look A Lot Like…War? WTF?

2011-12-25T00:10:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis
There is a war between the rich and poor,
a war between the man and the woman.
There is a war between the ones who say there is a war
and the ones who say there isn't. - Leonard Cohen, There is A War

This is getting really, really old. Every year, instead of ‘turning the other cheek’ (as they were advised to do by their own damn holy book), the religious nutjobs bellyache as if they had storm troopers dragging them out of their home in the wee hours, their bloody religious channels are being shut down, and churches are being burned.

None of which is even comparable (or occurring) to what they’re actually whining about. Witness:

‘War On Christmas’ Declared In America

Rows about the display of traditional Christmas symbols have broken out across the country.

But one of the pressure groups accused of being partly responsible has told Sky News it defends its campaign on behalf of non-Christians and non-believers.

The usual debate over whether it is acceptable to say ‘Merry Christmas’ or ‘Happy Holidays’ has exploded into a much wider disagreement this year.

Thousands of people took part in a prayer rally in the city of Athens in Texas after an atheist group took court action to have a nativity scene removed from outside the courthouse.

They claim it promotes Christianity and excludes non-Christians but a judge has so far ruled the traditional Christmas scene can stay.

The usual debate has become a much wider disagreement

Becky Paul, who was among those at the prayer rally, said: “Christ is the reason we’re here. I mean this is his birth, and that’s why we need to be celebrating and we just pray for the people who don’t believe.”

Carla Barron, another of those who turned up to show support, said: “It is not about the nativity scene, it is about Jesus. It is the reason we celebrate Christmas, Jesus is Christmas.”

The row in Athens is just part of a fierce nationwide debate about the right and wrongs of displaying religious symbols in public places.

The First Amendment of the US Constitution prohibits the government from promoting any religion but also prevents it from interfering in the practice of religion.

The issue has even featured in the race for the Republican presidential nomination.
Candidate Rick Perry produced a widely-parodied television commercial in which he said: “You don’t need to be in the pews every Sunday to know there is something wrong in our country.

“When gays can serve openly in the military but our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school. As president I will end Obama’s war on religion.”

The debate has taken a bizarre twist in Solana Beach City near San Diego in California – officials have removed the star from the top of the municipal tree just in case they get complaints about it.

The executive director of Americans United for the Separation of Church and State, one of the groups accused of being behind the “war on Christmas”, has dismissed the suggestion.

Barry Lynn told Sky News: “There is no war on Christmas. We have a dizzying level of obvious holiday displays. You can’t walk ten feet in any city in America and not realise there is a holiday called Christmas and that there is some kind of religious significance to it.

“I think what’s important is that at a holiday season it is not up to federal government, state government or city government to embrace one religion – Christianity – and its holiday celebrations over the many other religions practising in the United States and many non-believers.”

Seriously, how is this nonsense even news anymore? It’s over a decade old, which makes it ancient by media standards. What the real issue is, is that it’s a holiday that everyone can share in, and not everybody’s a Christian in the USA anymore. And like whiny children, the Christians are crying in their cups about the ‘good old days’, when you could get away with anything Christian-related, and nobody would say boo. Now it’s boo-fucking-hoo, why can’t we sledgehammer everyone with our religion whether they like it or not?

Hell, last Thursday afternoon I was getting a root canal (been through so many, it’s old hat – the biggest part of the inconvenience is sitting in the blasted chair), and my dentists’ office had this tape loop of Xmas songs, and the constant lyrics about ‘king of angels’, ‘jesus our savior’ and all that other tripe started getting to my stomach acids, especially after the umpteenth reiteration.

The persecution complex routine is getting stale. It’s kinda hysterical, that they tend to reserve all their charitability for one week out of the year, and the other 51 weeks they just behave like all the other assholes out there.

It’s a holiday. It’s a holiday that’s supposed to be about sharing – sharing yourself with others, others sharing themselves with you, and yet these folks (who all claim some sort of mysterious ‘higher road’ morality) don’t seem to get the reason for the season whatsoever.

Imaginary wars are usually the figments of some psychotically over-active imaginations.

Anyways, I wish all of our readers a very, very wicked Winterval, and remember: be good to each other.

Till the next post, then.

File Under ‘Things That Shouldn’t Be Funny But Are’

2011-12-20T21:05:00.001-08:00

It should be sad, but it’s somehow despicably hysterical:

(Enjoy?)

The Road To Theocracy Is Often Littered With Broken Promises…

2011-12-18T00:43:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

“Brad showed us that we had permission to speak out about the Judeo-Christian values that we believe in, that we don't have to cower or back down, or we don't have to spiritualize everything. We have every right as Americans to say, 'I don't believe in same-sex marriage.' That's what Brad reminds us.”

One of the consistently scarier elements of the religious in this country, is how they seem to mount a movement almost right beneath one’s nose, and suddenly pop out of nowhere. Granted, I tend to live in an internet-induced bubble for the most part, but these cats? Serious heebie-jeebie time.

Promise Keepers is an international conservative Christian organization for men. While it originated in the United States, it is now world-wide. It is self-described as "a Christ-centered organization dedicated to introducing men to Jesus Christ as their Savior and Lord, helping them to grow as Christians". Promise Keepers is a non-profit organization, not affiliated with any Christian church or denomination. Their most widely publicized events tend to be mass rallies held at football stadiums and similar venues. They also sell a variety of promotional products to "help men keep their promises," including clothing, books, and music. Dr. Bruce Wilkinson developed the widely-used video curriculum, Personal Holiness in Times of Temptation, as a part of “The Biblical Manhood” series for Promise Keepers.

‘Biblical manhood’? Talk about having a laugh.

Their statement of faith is fairly boilerplate. The ‘7 Promises’ is somewhat borderline worrisome. It’s obvious that they’re homophobic (while trying to appear to be anything but), as they vigorously oppose same-sex marriage. That right there places them directly in ass-clown county.

It was observed that they aren’t…quite right, as reported in this article:

However, critics of Promise Keepers charge its leaders routinely express views that are antithetical to the Bible's teachings, and outside the realm of mainstream belief. They claim it has an unbridled ecumenicism, a charismatic leadership emphasis, and relies on an anti-God secular psychology.
They say Promise Keepers mimics new-age male bonding and self-discovery therapies, and endorses a book which suggests levels of initiation rites to manhood. They decry its emphasis on phallic symbolism and the fact that Jesus is presented as a sexual male. They note that PK requires submission to leaders and employs a pyramid structure in its organization, that it intrudes on the privacy of a man's family life and sexual habits. They point out that the group encourages male domination of women, and is rooted in the Vineyard ministry, with strong links to the Kansas City Prophets -- a controversial cult claiming visions and revelations from God.
Critics say they do not presume to judge the integrity or the motives of all those in Promise Keepers or question the salvation of these men. They concede that many involved with PK are sincere. Instead, they say they are concerned with the doctrine of the movement and the ministry being promoted. They stress that any group that claims to represent Jesus must 1) preach a pure Gospel, and 2) address man's spiritual growth from an accurate interpretation of God's Word. Critics say Promise Keepers fails on both counts.
They worry that the vast majority of men who attend PK rallies probably know very little about the beliefs or church affiliation of the speakers who appear. The lecturers are accepted as authorities on Christian living simply because they say they are Christians and believe the Bible.
"Since the ministry of these teachers runs the gamut from compromising new-evangelicalism and charismatic error, to ecumenical liberalism, it is clear that they [are] introducing the Promise Keepers to unscriptural doctrines and fellowships," says Al Dager of Redmond, WA. "This is a very serious matter."
Rev. Gil Rugh, senior pastor of Indian Hills Community Church in Lincoln, NE. agrees. "There is so much theological diversity among those involved with Promise Keepers that no in-depth discussion of Scripture or what it means to be a Christian could take place without tearing the movement apart."
As one former Promise Keepers member remarked, "it's so diluted and deluded, you can't get very much out of it."

And here is a particularly chilling little bit:

Yet the religious right pantheon behind Promise Keepers consists of men who think the Republican party is too liberal. Founder Bill McCartney cut his political teeth speaking at rallies of the violent anti-abortion group Operation Rescue. In impassioned speeches — which are especially chilling when viewed on videotape — McCartney and company have said things like: men must be leaders and women "responders," lesbians and gays are "stark, raving mad," abortion is a "second Civil War" and participants must "take back the nation for Christ."

As Frederick Clarkson notes in "Eternal Hostility: The Struggle Between Theocracy and Democracy" (Common Courage Press, 1997), Promise Keepers aims to create "men of integrity" while its leaders model opportunistic double-talk. Honor your wife, but take back your role as head and master of your household. Seek racial "reconciliation" with hugs and tears among the biblically correct, but ignore racial injustice when it comes to education, jobs and housing. March on Washington, but assert it's not a political thing.

It is reminiscent of the way Promise Keepers backer Jerry Falwell claims he doesn't condone anti-abortion violence but paid $10,000 toward Operation Rescue boss Randy Terry's fine on a felony stemming from O.R.'s violent seige of women's health clinics during the 1988 Democratic National Convention in Atlanta.

Taking a page from Falwell's play book, a radical activist like McCartney insists his group itself is not at all political. Yet Falwell and other religious right doyens — Pat Robertson, Gary Bauer, James Dobson and Bill Bright — launched it financially, lent hundreds of staff members, continue to host and speak at Promise Keepers rallies, publish Promise Keepers books and sell their own politically packed treatises at Promise Keepers events.

Still not convinced? Try signing up as a Promise Keepers supporter, as an academic researcher did, and see if you, too, don't suddenly start getting mail from the Republican party that you never got before. Lurk online in a Promise Keepers chat group, as one journalist did, and see if you, too, don't note that abortion is the number one topic — not a woman's right to choose but an abortion opponent's right to kill women and doctors.

At this juncture, the Promise Keepers are relegated to little more than an historical footnote – they lost bundles, had major layoffs, and Joe (oops! I mean Bill) McCartney resigned in 2003, but returned in 2008 to become the chairMAN. So while not a big-time contender anymore (like the AFA, or Focus on the Family, or those other delusional fucks), they bear watching as well.

So keep an eye peeled. They may not be the barbarians at the gate we are accustomed to, doesn’t mean they’re not equally dangerous.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–30 Rock

2011-12-14T06:56:00.001-08:00

There’s fewer stranger yet funnier shows than 30 Rock.

Kenny questions the existence of god:

And for purely random hysteria, there’s nobody quite like Tracy Morgan:

Enjoy.

More Perry Tales–“Ya Gotta Have Faith!”

2011-12-11T00:27:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

You'll be so rich you can run for office without pretending to be a fundamentalist. - Gavin Volure, 30 Rock

One of the constants in any election for the past few decades (those that I can recall – elections, that is, not entire decades), is that most Republicans (and I’m sure there’s been a few Democrats too) see themselves as shepherds, and their constituency as sheep. Which is not too far-fetched. Reagan the Retard once stated that “Freedom prospers when religion is vibrant and the rule of law under God is acknowledged”, Bush Bonehead the Senior stating that, “You cannot be President of the United States if you don't have faith. Remember Lincoln, going to his knees in times of trial in the Civil War and all that stuff” (and the oft-quoted anti-atheist comment that bugs us all about citizenry), or George Bonehead the Junior and his declaration of : ”God told me to strike at al Qaida and I struck them, and then he instructed me to strike at Saddam, which I did, and now I am determined to solve the problem in the Middle East. If you help me I will act, and if not, the elections will come and I will have to focus on them.”

I’d like to think that these morons were just pandering, and likely snickering in the back room afterward, but it becomes abundantly clear they mean what they say. There’s way too much religious inanity bandied about on election campaigns.

Should someone be excluded because of their faith? Of course not. Should they be excluded if their faith takes precedence over their oath to the constitution? Damn straight. It’s blaringly obvious, especially after Dubya’s incredible declaration and subsequent invasion of the wrong country for all the wrong reasons, bundled with the obvious lies to justify it.

Here is a clip, from one of my favorite obscure movies The Contender, and the character is someone I would most definitely vote for:

It is of course a fantasy – the chances of an unapologetic forthright atheist getting that high in our government is nigh well impossible. At least in this decade.

But we can dream, can we not?

Till the next post then.

Wednesday Twofer–Random Humor

2011-12-07T07:20:00.001-08:00

My roommate turned me on to these two last night. WARNING: can get stuck in your head!

And a singing Saruman? Cool!

Enjoy. (And you have been warned!)

Oh Ye Of Little To No Faith–Better Keep One Eye Open As You Sleep

2011-12-03T22:52:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis
Yeesh. Just when I thought we were making some kind of progress (slow but steady wins the race is the saying), something like this crops up, spoils my optimistic mood, and activates my inner curmudgeon:

Atheists roughly as distrusted as rapists, UBC study finds

Atheists are distrusted to roughly the same degree as rapists, according to a new University of British Columbia study exploring distaste for disbelievers.

The research, led by UBC psychology doctoral student Will Gervais, found distrust to be the central factor motivating antagonism toward atheists among the religious.

"Where there are religious majorities – that is, in most of the world – atheists are among the least trusted people," Gervais said in a release.

"With more than half a billion atheists worldwide, this prejudice has the potential to affect a substantial number of people."

Researchers believe the negative perception of atheists may stem from some people's understanding of morality; a 2002 Pew poll suggests nearly half of Americans believe morality is impossible without belief in god.

For one part of Gervais' six-part study, researchers compared views of atheists, homosexual men and the general population, noting that the first two groups are "often described as threatening to majority religious values and morality."

Which is disheartening, to say the least. We are an ideological minority, which is why some folks like to suggest we shut our traps – a simple change of mind would help us fit in better. Never mind that discrimination is discrimination, regardless of abstract versus physiological differences. Never mind that we are as underrepresented in government as we are in prison (the former is sigh worthy, the latter YAY!). Or that the majority of criminals are usually fundamentalist delusionists. Or that the Crusades, the Inquisition (Spanish and otherwise), were perpetrated by Christians – let’s amp that one up, and say good god-fearing, praying self-flagellating Christians.

Because really, if you need to have someone (invisible or otherwise) peering over your shoulder and taking notes for future punishments to keep you in line, just how fucking moral are you then? Maybe it’s been done to death on the blogosphere, but it bears repeating. If someone’s invisible friend is suddenly absent (or proven to be absent), and that person became an atheist, just how often do we see headlines where someone has actually run riot with pillaging, rapine and murder? Has this ever happened? The recent stats show that there are approximately 4.7 million of us in America alone. So outside of the usual finger-pointing (“Look! That kid shot people because he didn’t believe! The economic downturn can be blamed on atheists! If there was more prayer in schools, children would be more moral!”), where are the numbers? Where are the press releases? If the scare-mongers are even CLOSE to being correct about atheism being a threat, where is the proof?

The simple answer: it’s not happening. Sure, there is the occasional crime committed by an atheist (we are all human, after all, there’s bound to be someone transgressing), but not even 1% of the approximated 4.7 million are rampaging through the streets threatening society at large. In fact, if we actually look at the drug cartels, the Mafioso, or any of the white-collar criminals of the last decade who stole and scammed millions of people, I’d bet we’re underrepresented there as well. The cartels as well as the Mafioso are predominantly Catholic. The white collar guys are likely Protestant.

It’s this concept of an invisible ledger that keeps track of all injustices that’s the real problem. Most people have this ridiculous idea that at some undefined point in life/time/the universe, all accounts will come due, be balanced, all scars and savagery healed and all bad guys will get their come-uppance. I’ve said it before: it’s a comic book perspective unfounded in reality. A lot of life’s villains died natural deaths in their sleep, and to go about believing that some nosy asshole in the sky’s going to take care of your injuries (real or imagined) is just a fantasy.

The afterlife concept. It’s poison.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Dr. Seuss And The Bible

2011-11-30T18:41:00.001-08:00

Definitely a classic – the Kids In The Hall dish it out.

Enjoy.

Thanksgiving–Giving Thanks To The Living

2011-11-26T23:47:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It’s generally accepted that of all the holidays, Thanksgiving in America is the least offensive of them. Halloween is Satan’s foot in the door to children’s souls, somebody somewhere is waging war on Xmas, yeah yeah, somebody somewhere is getting stoked about something. It’s America, country of lawyers and hurt feelings.

But the title itself lends itself to some wide-open translation. Just who are we thanking, actually? For millions of Americans, it’s that God fellow, the imaginary sky daddy who somehow mysteriously provided the bounty at the table – regardless of all the hard work put in by the adults in the house who worked their fingers to the bone, the farmers who put in months of work to provide the turkey the butter the wheat for bread, the truck drivers who lost valuable hours of sleep transporting these items over long lonely roads, the furniture that’s sat on (regardless whether it’s handcrafted or from Ikea)…you get the picture, right?

The worst part is when we, the atheists, get strong-armed into praying at the table. This happened to me about four years ago, and when my mother passed, I was completely cut out of the funeral arrangements, the car promised to me was taken without a word or note – it was ugly. I haven’t spoken to my family for going on four years now. I had to take a stand. A painful stand, but hey…principles are principles, no?

It’s about respect.

If someone were to welcome a Muslim, a Jew, or any other denomination to their dinner table, it would be un-American to force them to pray a Christian prayer. Because freedom of religion is freedom FROM religion. Diverse ideology is one of the many freedoms granted to others. An atheist in America, however, is told to shut up and sit down. Come to think of it, that is the pat response regardless of situation or content.

I reject the supernatural, and find the action of prayer offensive to the extreme. You want to? Knock yourself out. Just leave me out of it. Please.

Sometimes the word ‘please’ just doesn’t work. You hear wheedling, cajoling, and if dealing with family, ‘can I talk to you in private?’ followed with a lot of whispered shouting.

It’s hard, but refuse. Raise your voice. Flat out refuse. If you’ve asked, implored, and otherwise rationally explained yourself in a calm tone, and nothing’s worked, then you may as well raise some hell.

It’s about principles.

You don’t drop your principles because they’re inconvenient, or make people uncomfortable. If you do, then they’re not principles, they’re lip service. The world has enough sycophants, yes-men and ass-kissers. So take a stand. Hold your ground. You don’t want to pray? Don’t. Say so. Out loud. No whispering.

Because this is America. If you force someone to pray, you’re violating the First Amendment profoundly.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Homer’s Evolution

2011-11-23T13:52:00.001-08:00

This is an all time classic:

Enjoy.

Allegories Gone Wild: Satan Wants Your Children!

2011-11-20T01:15:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It’s the clarion call of the Christian scaremongers: somewhere deep in the bowels of the earth, some dark thing conspires to control and warp not only the adults, but the children. Oh, think of the children!

If I have been unclear in the past, I shall reiterate: conspiracy theories are for the large part pure hokum. Not being a psychiatrist of any sort, I can only speculate why people become so heavily vested in them. There’s a wide variety out there. There’s the 9/11 wackaloons who are convinced that our government purposely brought down the Twin Towers, there’s the JFK assassination enthusiasts, then there’s the Bilderburg balderdash, the Zurich Gnome manure – the list is exhaustive, and many of you have heard these before. The huge percentage of these are in excessive violation of Ockham’s Razor. This is not to say conspiracies don’t exist – just that the cottage industry is glutted with so many entities, it boggles the rational mind. For the most part, it’s not a battle for hearts and minds. Pursuit of the almighty dollar? Most definitely. But intricate long-term plots to control the world? Please. People are greedy. Ergo, they pursue money, sometimes with a sociopathic fanaticism.

But above all others, the ‘occult conspiracy’ is probably the most pathetic of all. That shadowy taloned fingers are slowly inching towards your ‘soul’ to enslave and/or gobble you/it up? Honky, please.

We’ve all encountered these paranoid people before. Some of us may have relatives that will, without any prompting whatsoever, began slathering their blathering on anyone within earshot. It’s ridiculous. I could cover all the old worn ground like so many times before: the bible has no authority whatsoever, energy isn’t destroyed but proof that information somehow survives death is non-existent (as is the proof that there’s anything remotely resembling the ill-defined ‘soul’), etc. etc. ad nauseum ad infinitum..

If anything deserves ridicule, it’s this comic book conception of our ontological significance.

This garbage has a long history, dating all the way back to when our ancestors attained self-awareness while huddled frightened around primitive campfires, starting at bizarre noises outside the circle of light, and the slightest mishap could make one a predator’s meal. Introversive as our species is, it’s a small leap to assume the world at large has it in for us. And again, the entities multiply needlessly.

Even today, we hear about how playing D&D can lead our children down the path of witchcraft, Ouija boards are the gateway drug to demonic possession, and even how Harry Potter (a fictional person) can pollute our kids’ precious bodily fluids.

So I bring you this blast from the past: one Phillip Phillips (I defecate thee not), who, in the 1980’s, did this bit of idiocy (courtesy of Dribbleglass):

Phil Phillips is the author of Turmoil in the Toybox (1986), Halloween and Satanism (1987), Saturday Morning Mind Control (1991), and Dinosaurs: The Bible, Barney, and Beyond (1994). Turmoil in the Toybox is about how the Smurfs, Care Bears, My Little Pony, He-Man, Mighty Mouse, Cabbage Patch Kids, and Rainbow Bright are all WICKED DEVIL TOYS STRAIGHT FROM THE PIT OF HELL ITSELF leading our precious children into ruin! The other three book titles speak for themselves. Halloween and Satanism includes some perhaps unwitting but still overt anti-Semitism on display in the author's choice of images and captions.

Typical 1980s sensationalism for the Christian paranoia market. His books were sold in every Christian bookstore, on prominent display right next to those of Texe Marrs.

Phil and his wife Cynthia have since authored Miracle Parenting, on the subject of "Biblical parenting", and a book on Attention Deficit Disorder called ADD: Welcome to Our World. The book (also available in audio version) is based on Phil’s personal testimony of finding out, as an adult, that he was ADD.

Really? Seriously? Yes, seriously. The Smurfs were a part of some vast Satanic conspiracy. As were the Care Bears, He-Man, and…MIGHTY MOUSE?!?!?

Sad. Just sad. Can’t use the word pathetic often enough. I think the best illustration (and best summation) of this folderol was done by Robot Chicken:

So, if you’re ever within earshot of some wild-eyed stupid conversation about this topic, just do what I would (or will) do: point and laugh hilariously.

Because all opinions are not even CLOSE to being equal.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer - Futurama

2011-11-16T22:59:00.001-08:00

This one’s about Futurama’s Schrodinger:

And a fantastic Windows Vista joke:

Enjoy.

A Fallen American Idol: Paterno The Pedophile Protector

2011-11-13T00:08:00.001-08:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

When my colleague posted this, I had no idea who this clown was.

Further research revealed more frightening facts. Continuous raping of minors. Eyewitnesses not coming forward. All sorts of parallels with the Catholic Church spring to mind.

Moreover, other evidence mounts in the case against religion. Paterno was the all American ideal: he was a winning coach with enough awards to choke a horse. A philanthropist of sorts, he had a pretty good coaching record. He’s the father of five children, the grandfather of seventeen. To the normal Christian (prior to the scandal), he’d be the epitome of the American dream. Catholic, conservative, a friend and endorser of George W.

The whole problem is that he’s PROTECTING a child rapist.

Seriously, what the fuck is up with these people? There’s a mounting list of Republicans who are consistently two-faced shitbags, espousing religious sanctimony and the mythical ‘American family values’ while dropping their pants and indulging whatever sick whim they choose.

The hypocrisy is enough to wrench the stomach.

When is the American public going to get a clue, and realize the Republican party is a bad joke as well as shot through and through with sexual sociopaths?

To top off the idiocy, some nitwits are STILL hollering ‘gawd’!

~~My prediction is that, like rats deserting a sinking ship, his former pals will drop him like an old shoe. His poor family is stuck with him.~~

And it winds down to one of my old motifs. Religion: it improves no one.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–Family Guy And Jay-sus!

2011-11-09T12:35:00.001-08:00

Standard classic: Jesus wasn’t all that magic after all:

And of course, Black Jesus!

Enjoy.

In WHO Do We Trust, Exactly? More Nonsense From The Religious Right

2011-11-05T23:09:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Recently, due to a bad run, I’ve had to move in with a friend while I scavenge at the bottom of the abysmal job market. And yes, he’s a Christian (and a creationist to boot), but he’s an old and dear friend. We assiduously avoid religious discussions (as they end in loud acrimony), but we co-exist, which is the way it should be. He’s thoroughly familiar with my position ona religion long before he agreed to help me out.

So Saturday morning, I’m awakened by his loud neighbors at 8 (why people feel the need to carry out conversations at the top of their lungs regardless of the hour, is beyond me. Nobody cares but them.), so I clamber off the inflatable bed in the corner and start cruising the channels (I didn’t have TV at the old apartment, so it’s kinda a treat), when I come across a listing on C-SPAN title ‘In God We Trust’. So I flip to it, with frighteningly predictable results:

Mind you, this is just a taste of an hour-long waste of our taxpayer dollars. And they pulled out all the old (re)tired tropes. Here’s a smattering of the oldies-but-moldies:

1. Our found fathers created this country because of their belief in god.

This is just a stupid argument: it’s an argument from tradition, and it relies on the deification of the founders as some sort of saintly GODSQUAD. The simplest counter? They also ‘believed’ in: slavery, leeches, that water was bad for them (a good percentage, likely 100, is that they were soused most of the time anyways), Benjamin Rush thought that being born non-white was a congenital defect (he also used to tie down patients on a board and spin them, to cure what I don’t recall), Washington wanted to be king, Hamilton was a raging asshole (Burr did us a favor there) – the litany goes on. The point is that they were wrong about a great deal of things. They were correct about many other things. Why? Because they were human beings. We could go over an exhaustive list of their flaws, but for the sake of brevity, I shall move on.

2. The Declaration of Independence speaks of a ‘Divine Judge’, that every man is given their rights by their creator.

This is by far one of the more obnoxious of the litany of tropes. The word ‘Creator’ is obviously deliberately left ambiguous.Why? Because some of the founders were Deists. I couldn’t tell you the demographics of the period, i.e., how many Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, or Muslims were extant at that time. Obviously there were some around. That one of the rethuglickans actually interpolated the word ‘divine judge’ in his nonsense was offensive as well as egregious. By modern standards, I can claim my rights derive from my parents, fer FSM’s sake. I illustrated in one of my essays from 2007 that five of the big founders would not be elected by neo-cons today.

3. It’s on the walls, it’s on our currency, etc.

The first time the 'logo’ showed up was in 1864. I’m fairly sure that all the founders were deceased by then. So the founders argument flounders on this point, because that’s 88 years AFTER this country was founded. It didn’t even show up on our paper currency until 1964, which is 288 years after our inception. Republicans don’t fact-check. How is this not a surprise?

The other issue is that our actual motto (until Eisenhower passed that law in 1956, due to McCarthyism and the Cold War) was E Pluribus Unum, which was actually approved by the founders, and means "Out of many, one". Never mind the infamous Treaty of Tripoli, Article 11, which unequivocally states that, “As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion,—as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquility, of Mussulmen,—and as the said States never entered into any war or act of hostility against any Mahometan nation, it is declared by the parties that no pretext arising from religious opinions shall ever produce an interruption of the harmony existing between the two countries.” This was also passed unequivocally by the senate in 1797, and signed by the president (Article 11 included).

(The argument usually used, is that this a sovereignty treaty, and therefore doesn’t apply. However, such treaties are as a rule represent the state of law in said country.)

The Constitution nor the Bill of Rights state any of the key points of Christianity: there is no declaration of Jehovah or Yahweh (or whatever ‘name’ the Christian would provide); there is no declamation that “Jesus is our lord”; nor is there any mention of the alleged resurrection. Those are the big three points, any of which being present would prove that this is a ‘Christian nation’. Historically, the Christians were excessively intolerant of other faiths, ergo there would be no First Amendment statement tolerating any other religion.

And the repercussions were ridiculous for the few who dissented.

“Fox Nation’ immediately posted the names of the nine people who voted against Resolution 13. Keith Ellison, the only elected Muslim representative, voted ‘present’, and abstained. He spoke to it later, stating that “We’re out of our lane. We’re in their [The American People’s] private religious affairs, not doing what we’re supposed to be doing, which is getting the economy working.” (Good advice, I say.)

The rest of the nonsense can be found here, if you have the stomach for it.

What none of these pandering politicians get, is that the language is demonstrating an exclusivity in an inclusive society. When one stipulates “In God We Trust”, it is a clear violation of church and state: that in referring to “God”, it is clearly bent in favor of the Judeo-Christian deity: the Jews spell it “G_d”, the Muslims holler “ALLAH AKBAR”, the Hindus bring up Brahma, etc..

The free pass is over, folks. Your two hundred years of domination is over. Time for a level playing field.

Get used to it.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–The Big Bang Theory

2011-11-02T17:40:00.001-07:00

I adore this show – it’s about time nerds rocked the telly.

Sheldon, of course, is my favorite character.

Enjoy.

Happy Birthday, Mother Earth? No It Ain’t– It’s Just Their Imagination, Running Away With Them…

2011-10-22T23:09:00.001-07:00

But it was just my imagination -- once again --
running away with me.
I tell you it was just my imagination
running away with me... – The Temptations, Just my imagination

For those of you unfamiliar with one James Ussher, Primate of All Ireland, this is the fellow who, using the Old Testament, claimed to come up with the exact age of planet Earth: the night preceding October 23, 4004 BC (BCE for those of you pedantic enough to point it out).

The Chinese took a swing at this, and claimed mama Gaea was 36,000 years old.

Most of the Greeks were ‘agnostic’ about it, but some guessed the world was eternal, and Plutarch recorded that some Tuscan sages claimed the world was re-created every 25,868 years.

The ancient Egyptians put it at somewhere around 39,670 BC. The Babylonians/Sumerians put it at a few hundred thousand years before them (but they also had kings who ruled for thousands of years, so it’s kinda sketchy). The Arabians put it as 6174 BC, the Mayans claimed it was August 11 3114 BC, the Hindus guessed somewhere around 158.7 trillion years (way to overshoot!), and we won’t even go into what the Zoroastrians claim (mostly because that cosmological gibberish gives me a brain ache).

As always, these estimates weren’t made via scientific observation, but extreme guesswork and were skewed by whomever was in power in that culture at the time.

Of course now we know that it’s all rubbish. Or most of us do. Some folks still have no clue. Scarier still is that some of them are running for office. As if that’s not enough, we have all sorts of creationist idiots taking a run at the presidency.

It is a sad, sad statement about our species that these fairy tales are still taken seriously.

(Oh, and as an aside, wish me a happy 53rd birthday.)

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–Sterling Archer

2011-10-19T19:16:00.001-07:00

I absolutely love this animation. I don’t care what anyone says.

And to emphasize the utter disregard Archer has for other people and their feelings:

Enjoy.

Allegories Gone Wild: The Sky Is Falling…Why? Because It Was Predicted

2011-10-15T23:29:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Ah, hell, Shepherd, I ain't looking for help from on high. That's a long wait for a train don't come. – Malcolm Reynolds, Serenity

As my colleague Ray Garton has pointed out (more than once), the inmates are trying to run the asylum. And they’re protected by a built in customer base (religion), a political correctness that borders on fascism (don’t discuss religion or politics at the dinner table), and some serious misinterpretation of both law and the idiocies of their ‘holy book’.

(My neck is tired from all the double-takes: nothing these people do really surprises, any more.)

As this article points out, it’s not enough that these clowns oppose quality-of-life issues like abortion, same-sex marriage, or stem cell research. But exactly why are these puppets rabidly anti-environmental?

Forty-five senators and 186 representatives in 2003 earned 80- to 100-percent approval ratings from the nation's three most influential Christian right advocacy groups -- the Christian Coalition, Eagle Forum, and Family Resource Council. Many of those same lawmakers also got flunking grades -- less than 10 percent, on average -- from the League of Conservation Voters last year.

These statistics are puzzling at first. Opposing abortion and stem-cell research is consistent with the religious right's belief that life begins at the moment of conception. Opposing gay marriage is consistent with its claim that homosexual activity is proscribed by the Bible. Both beliefs are a familiar staple of today's political discourse. But a scripture-based justification for anti-environmentalism?

Many Christian fundamentalists feel that concern for the future of our planet is irrelevant, because it has no future. They believe we are living in the End Time, when the son of God will return, the righteous will enter heaven, and sinners will be condemned to eternal hellfire. They may also believe, along with millions of other Christian fundamentalists, that environmental destruction is not only to be disregarded but actually welcomed -- even hastened -- as a sign of the coming Apocalypse.

If ever there was a clear and present danger from Christianity, this is a sign (no pun intended). There has always been a consistent destructive fantasy among the delusionists (this goes for Muslims, religious Jews, and yes, even Falun Gong practitioners) that someone somewhere is keeping track of all transactions good or bad on some invisible ledger somewhere, and all accounts (and everyone’s hash) will be settled in full at the appropriate time. Let’s never mind that this has never happened: let’s disregard that this has been predicted multiple times beyond count (and not happened): let’s ignore the obvious signs that this will never happen.

It’s disastrous wish-fulfillment of the worst kind. It’s proof that belief in an afterlife poisons everything.

Am I scare-mongering? Uh-uh:

We are not talking about a handful of fringe lawmakers who hold or are beholden to these beliefs. The 231 legislators (all but five of them Republicans) who received an average 80 percent approval rating or higher from the leading religious-right organizations make up more than 40 percent of the U.S. Congress. (The only Democrat to score 100 percent with the Christian Coalition was Sen. Zell Miller of Georgia, who earlier this year quoted from the Book of Amos on the Senate floor: "The days will come, sayeth the Lord God, that I will send a famine in the land. Not a famine of bread or of thirst for water, but of hearing the word of the Lord!") These politicians include some of the most powerful figures in the U.S. government, as well as key environmental decision makers: Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist (R-Tenn.), Senate Majority Whip Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.), Senate Republican Conference Chair Rick Santorum (R-Penn.), Senate Republican Policy Chair Jon Kyl (R-Ariz.), House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-Ill.), House Majority Whip Roy Blunt (R-Mo.), U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft, and quite possibly President Bush. (Earlier this month, a cover story by Ron Suskind in The New York Times Magazine described how Bush's faith-based governance has led to, among other things, a disastrous "crusade" in the Middle East and has laid the groundwork for "a battle between modernists and fundamentalists, pragmatists and true believers, reason and religion.")

Nervous yet? I certainly am.

And those politicians are just the powerful tip of the iceberg. A 2002 Time/CNN poll found that 59 percent of Americans believe that the prophecies found in the Book of Revelation are going to come true. Nearly one-quarter think the Bible predicted the 9/11 attacks.

Fifty-nine percent? That number is way too high.

Like it or not, faith in the Apocalypse is a powerful driving force in modern American politics. In the 2000 election, the Christian right cast at least 15 million votes, or about 30 percent of those that propelled Bush into the presidency. And there's no doubt that arch-conservative Christians will be just as crucial in the coming election: GOP political strategist Karl Rove hopes to mobilize 20 million fundamentalist voters to help sweep Bush back into office on Nov. 2 and to maintain a Republican majority in Congress, says Joan Bokaer, director of Theocracy Watch, a project of the Center for Religion, Ethics, and Social Policy at Cornell University.

It is enough to make one weep.

Because of its power as a voting bloc, the Christian right has the ear, if not the souls, of much of the nation's leadership. Some of those leaders are End-Time believers themselves. Others are not. Either way, their votes are heavily swayed by an electoral base that accepts the Bible as literal truth and eagerly awaits the looming Apocalypse. And that, in turn, is sobering news for those who hope for the protection of the earth, not its destruction.

It’s very much an acknowledged fact that global warming is a reality: you’d have to be in severe denial to say otherwise. Even Rupert Murdoch, he of the Fox News and overt Republican idiocies, admits this.

Sure, we’ve all known this for some time: the question is, what are we doing about it? We should do more. I personally engage people regularly (in person) when religion is brought up. I point out the inadequacies, the wrongnesses, the weirdnesses and wackiness of their holy book. It’s tedious: more often, when bracing a ‘true believer’, the dialogue goes a little paraphrase like this: “The bible contradicts itself regularly. The biology in the bible is completely wrong: the historicity of the bible is not only questionable, it’s risible. The bible is short on anything resembling facts, and long on imaginative whimsy.” The TB™ only hears “The bible blah-blah-blah. The blah-blah in the bible blah-blah-blah.” So I introduce it as this: “I refuse to recognize the bible as an authority on ANYTHING.” On occasion, I quip that “I’m short on TP, could I have your copy?”

But these individual efforts are, to quote the bard, “taking arms against a sea of troubles,” or in more modern lingo, a drop in the ocean. Sites like ours do have some impact – a site like Undo Jesus is having impact as well. We can write letters to our respective representatives (in droves, hopefully) informing them that this scabrous textbook is only unsuitable for as an operator’s manual, it’s not fit for children to even read in any context.

So we need to get out there more. Besides the armchair scholarship of blogging. It is doing something, to be sure, but to borrow some terminology, it’s easier to preach to the choir than upbraid a mob.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Twofer – George Carlin

2011-10-11T09:18:00.001-07:00

Here’s a man I miss terribly – George Carlin.

Religion Is Bullshit:

Old GC on the 10 Commandments:

Enjoy.

Wait–We Have A Holiday For WHO?!?!? A True Christian From The History Books…

2011-10-09T00:17:00.001-07:00

As an atheist, I’m no big fan of holidays. In fact, we have far too many of them in this country. Luckily, Groundhog’s Day doesn’t interrupt the mail service, Valentine’s Day is a paean to lovers everywhere (even though it’s allegedly based on secret Christian weddings in the bad old days of pagan Rome), Saint Patrick’s day is an excuse to get hammered, wear green and sport buttons that say “kiss me, I’m Irish”, and one of them is even a fun holiday to play pranks on people.

But Christopher Columbus? You gotta be fucking kidding me.

I grew up (as most of you probably did also) hearing about how this cat set out to discover the Far East, only to get somewhat hampered by the intervening continent in his way. Hell, I’ll bet you even remember that old mnemonic, “In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue.”

For the most part, very little was ever mentioned about these voyages except that they were harsh (scurvy was a constant threat), and that some crewmen died en route. When I was a kid, there was absolutely no mention of this ass-clown’s subsequent behavior.

So let’s recap, for those of you familiar, and for those of you who aren’t, be prepared to be horrified.

Good old Chris, on his first voyage:

Columbus called the island (in what is now The Bahamas) San Salvador; the natives called it Guanahani. Exactly which island in the Bahamas this corresponds to is an unresolved topic; prime candidates are Samana Cay, Plana Cays, or San Salvador Island (so named in 1925 in the belief that it was Columbus's San Salvador). The indigenous people he encountered, the Lucayan, Taíno or Arawak, were peaceful and friendly. From the 12 October 1492 entry in his journal he wrote of them, "Many of the men I have seen have scars on their bodies, and when I made signs to them to find out how this happened, they indicated that people from other nearby islands come to San Salvador to capture them; they defend themselves the best they can. I believe that people from the mainland come here to take them as slaves. They ought to make good and skilled servants, for they repeat very quickly whatever we say to them. I think they can very easily be made Christians, for they seem to have no religion. If it pleases our Lord, I will take six of them to Your Highnesses when I depart, in order that they may learn our language." He remarked that their lack of modern weaponry and even metal-forged swords or pikes was a tactical vulnerability, writing, "I could conquer the whole of them with 50 men, and govern them as I pleased."

And then:

Columbus also explored the northeast coast of Cuba (landed on 28 October) and the northern coast of Hispaniola, by 5 December. Here, the Santa Maria ran aground on Christmas Day 1492 and had to be abandoned. He was received by the native cacique Guacanagari, who gave him permission to leave some of his men behind. Columbus left 39 men and founded the settlement of La Navidad at the site of present-day Môle-Saint-Nicolas, Haiti.On 13 January 1493 Columbus made his last stop in the New World. He landed on the Samaná Peninsula where he met the hostile Ciguayos who presented him with his only violent resistance during his first voyage to the Americas. Because of this, and the Ciguayos' use of arrows, he called the inlet where he met them the Bay of Arrows (or Gulf of Arrows). Today the place is called the Bay of Rincon, in Samaná, the Dominican Republic. Columbus kidnapped about 10 to 25 natives and took them back with him (only seven or eight of the native Indians arrived in Spain alive, but they made quite an impression on Seville).

He just took people against their will. Whatta sweetheart, ey?

Buckle up kids, it gets worse:

On 22 November Columbus returned to Hispaniola, where he intended to visit Fuerte de la Navidad (Christmas Fort), built during his first voyage, and located on the northern coast of Haiti. Columbus found Fuerte de la Navidad in ruins, destroyed by the native Taino people.

Among the ruins were the corpses of 11 of the first 39 Spanish to have attempted New World colonization. Columbus then required from the Taino that each adult over 14 years of age was expected to deliver a hawks bell full of gold every three months, or when this was lacking, twenty five pounds of spun cotton. If this tribute was not observed, the Taínos had their hands cut off and were left to bleed to death. Columbus then moved more than 100 kilometers eastwards, establishing a new settlement, which he called La Isabela, likewise on the northern coast of Hispaniola, in the present-day Dominican Republic. However, La Isabela proved to be a poorly chosen location, and the settlement was short-lived.

Another good Christian who’d never heard of ‘turning the other cheek’.

Prince Charming had even more tricks up his sleeve:

Columbus returned to Hispaniola on 19 August to find that many of the Spanish settlers of the new colony were discontented, having been misled by Columbus about the supposedly bountiful riches of the new world. An entry in his journal from September 1498 reads, "From here one might send, in the name of the Holy Trinity, as many slaves as could be sold..." Since Columbus supported the enslavement of the Hispaniola natives for economic reasons, he ultimately refused to baptize them, as Catholic law forbade the enslavement of Christians.

He had some of his crew hanged for disobeying him. A number of returning settlers and sailors lobbied against Columbus at the Spanish court, accusing him and his brothers of gross mismanagement. On his return he was arrested for a period (see Governorship and arrest section below).

Even in an age of gross barbarism, this guy stood out. And get this – on his fourth voyage, he ended up getting help from the same people he supported enslaving:

For a year Columbus and his men remained stranded on Jamaica. A Spaniard, Diego Mendez, and some natives paddled a canoe to get help from Hispaniola. That island's governor, Nicolás de Ovando y Cáceres, detested Columbus and obstructed all efforts to rescue him and his men. In the meantime Columbus, in a desperate effort to induce the natives to continue provisioning him and his hungry men, successfully won the favor of the natives by correctly predicting a lunar eclipse for 29 February 1504, using the Ephemeris of the German astronomer Regiomontanus.

To top off his ‘accomplishments’, he was arrested and detained after being a governor:

The Court appointed Francisco de Bobadilla, a member of the Order of Calatrava, but not as the aide that Columbus had requested. Instead, Bobadilla was given complete control as governor from 1500 until his death in 1502. Arriving in Santo Domingo while Columbus was away, Bobadilla was immediately peppered with complaints about all three Columbus brothers: Christopher, Bartolomé, and Diego. Consuelo Varela, a Spanish historian, states: "Even those who loved him [Columbus] had to admit the atrocities that had taken place."Columbus before the Queen, imagined by Emanuel Gottlieb Leutze, 1843

As a result of these testimonies and without being allowed a word in his own defense, Columbus, upon his return, had manacles placed on his arms and chains on his feet and was cast into prison to await return to Spain. He was 48 years old.

[snip]

According to an uncatalogued document supposedly discovered very late in history purporting to be a record of Columbus's trial which contained the alleged testimony of 23 witnesses, Columbus regularly used barbaric acts of torture to govern Hispaniola.

Delusional? You tell me:

While Columbus had always given the conversion of non-believers as one reason for his explorations, he grew increasingly religious in his later years. Probably with the assistance of his son Diego and his friend the Carthusian monk Gaspar Gorricio, Columbus produced two books during his later years: a Book of Privileges (1502), detailing and documenting the rewards from the Spanish Crown to which he believed he and his heirs were entitled, and a Book of Prophecies (1505), in which passages from the Bible were used to place his achievements as an explorer in the context of Christian eschatology.

A Christian explorer using cherry-picking to justify himself? What are the odds? (Pretty damn good.)

As if these horrors aren’t enough, these excerpts from Lies My Teacher Told Me should be enough to enrage our readers to write to their representatives in Washington to get this holiday off the books altogether:

"Christopher Columbus introduced two phenomena that revolutionized race relations and transformed the modern world: the taking of land, wealth, and labor from indigenous peoples, leading to their near extermination, and the transatlantic slave trade, which created a racial underclass" (60).

"When Columbus and his men returned to Haiti in 1493, they demanded food, gold, spun cotton--whatever the Indians had that they wanted, including sex with their women. To ensure cooperation, Columbus used punishment by example. When an Indian committed even a minor offense, the Spanish cut off his ears or nose" (61).

"..attempts at resistance gave Columbus an excuse to make war... For this he chose 200 foot soldiers and 20 cavalry, with many crossbows and small cannon, lances, and swords, and a still more terrible weapon against the Indians, in addition to the horses: this was 20 hunting dogs, who were turned loose and immediately tore the Indians apart" (61).

"Columbus.. initiated a great slave raid. They rounded up 1,500 Arawaks, then selected the 500 best specimens (of whom 200 would die en route to Spain. Another 500 were chosen as slaves for the Spaniards staying on the island" (62).

"Spaniards hunted Indians for sport and murdered them for dog food. Columbus, upset because he could not locate the gold he was certain was on the island, set up a tribute system... The Indians all promised to pay tribute.. every three months... With a fresh token, an Indian was safe for three months, much of which time would be devoted to collecting more gold... the Spanish punished those whose tokens had expired: they cut off their hands" (62).

"Columbus installed the encomienda system, in which he granted or "commended" entire Indian villages to individual colonists or groups of colonists... On Haiti the colonists made the Indians mine gold for them, raise Spanish food, and even carry them everywhere they went" (63). An Spanish observer wrote that "As a result of the sufferings and hard labor they endured [under this virtual slavery], the Indians choose and have chosen suicide. Occasionally a hundred have committed mass suicide. The women, exhausted by labor, have shunned conception and childbirth... Many, when pregnant, have taken something to abort and have aborted. Others after delivery have killed their children with their own hands, so as not to leave them in such oppressive slavery"" (63).

"Estimates of Haiti's pre-Columbian population range as high as 8,000,000 people... a census of Indian adults in 1496.. came up with 1,100,000... "By 1516," according to Benjamin Keen, "thanks to the sinister Indian slave trade and labor policies initiated by Columbus, only some 12,000 remained." Las Casas tells us that fewer than 200 Indians were alive in 1542. By 1555, they were all gone" (63).

".. one of the primary instances of genocide in all human history" (64).

"Columbus not only sent the first slaves across the Atlantic, he probably sent more slaves--about five thousand--than any other individual... other nations rushed to emulate Columbus" (64).

"As soon as the 1493 expedition got to the Caribbean, before it even reached Haiti, Columbus was rewarding his lieutenants with native women to rape. On Haiti, sex slaves were one more prerequisite that the Spaniards enjoyed. Columbus wrote a friend in 1500, "... it is very general and there are plenty of dealers who go about looking for girls; those from nine to ten are now in demand"" (65).

"Columbus is not a hero in Mexico... Why not? Because Mexico is also much more Indian than the United States, and Mexicans perceive Columbus as white and European. "No sensible Indian person," wrote George P. Horse Capture, "can celebrate the arrival of Columbus." Cherishing Columbus is a characteristic of white history, not American history" (70).

"The worshipful biographical vignettes of Columbus in our textbooks serve to indoctrinate students into a mindless endorsement of colonialism... the Columbus myth allows us to accept the contemporary division of the world into developed and underdeveloped spheres as natural and given, rather than a historical product issuing from a process that began with Columbus's first voyage" (70)

There will be plenty of Christians who will deplore these acts as barbaric and savage, and rightly so. But the majority of them will rationalize that old Chris was not a ‘True Christian’. Unfortunately for them, he was. A simple in-depth reading of the Old Testament (and some of the New) will amply demonstrate that these were common (and sanctioned) acts based on their holy text. Slavery is a biblical injunction, and the mistreatment of non-believers par for the course. Genocide is not only justified in the bible, it’s also smiled upon as an act that was directed by their deity, and in some cases perpetrated on the ‘chosen people’. Even rape isn’t beyond that tome of horrors.

So yes, old assclown Columbus was most definitely playing by the set of rules put forth by those Iron-age shepherds of yore. Every single act he perpetrated fits neatly into the superstitions of the day, and the words written in that Necronomicon of old, the Wholly Bibble.

He was an evil fuckwad, whose only just deserts are that people should urinate on his grave. He was a pimp, a slaver, a butcher, a tyrant, and an idiot. That anyone has a holiday for this bozo is not just a wart on the face of this country, but full-blown metaphorical melanoma.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–MADTV

2011-10-05T13:21:00.001-07:00

This is absolutely hilarious:

I’ve heard the occasional story about clowns like this, but have never met one. Have you?

Anyways, enjoy.

I Believe

2011-10-01T23:25:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: He is always convinced that it says what he means. – Shaw

Can you count how many times you’ve heard someone express their opinion with “I believe that!” or an “I don’t believe that!”? Unless you’re a hardcore atheist like myself, you might not have noticed how prevalent it is. Sadly, it is ubiquitous. I cannot count on my fingers and toes (even if I was the some Hindu goddess even) how many times this has been uttered in my presence. And if you are anything like me, you likely wince inwardly (or outwardly) or perhaps roll your eyes at the cliché.

And now we actually have a Blasphemy Day (thanks Sue – I hadn’t even known), where we can actually shout it from the rooftops if we so wish, when once upon a time, this would be grounds for execution (and in some countries, it still is).

As PZ Meyers points out, this is no big whoop, as every day is Blasphemy Day. But it does feel pretty good, does it not? I take every opportunity I can to undermine and blaspheme religion (void where prohibited, heheheheh) on the proviso that it’s in an appropriate setting or proper timing. Alas, my filters aren’t all that good, and I do upon occasion blurt out an instant response (I have a close friend who told me the other day, that I have the “ability to say exactly what I’m thinking” – much to my own detriment sometimes).

Belief is such a tricksy word. And the religionists play word games, word salad games, and try to infer/imply that somehow our confidence in evidence is equivalent to their superstitious wishes, when clearly it is not even on the same playing-field.

I agree with G.E. Berrios who states that “delusions are genuine beliefs and instead labels them as "empty speech acts", where affected persons are motivated to express false or bizarre belief statements due to an underlying psychological disturbance. “

Because no doubt you’ve overheard conversations that were running out of steam, and someone inserts “but [insert deity here] has a plan for you!”, which in my not-so-humble-opinion are efforts to keep said discussions running (for whatever reason the speaker has). And a word like ‘God’ is fraught with meaning only because it’s a placeholder and an open receptacle for any definition (obviously not an operable one) that the speaker wishes it to have.

So join me in chiming in, on every Blasphemy Day (that’s 365 days a year), when you hear that empty phrase “I believe that!” (or the other one), step up and say:

“It doesn’t matter what you believe.”

Mind you, do that on a case-to-case basis; it might not be advisable to burst into a mosque or a revival tent and blurt that out. Just sayin’.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny–‘A Fistful Of Darwin’

2011-09-27T08:12:00.001-07:00

Welcome to the Survival Of The Fittest Saloon:

Enjoy.

More On The Madness Of Muslim: Moammar Is Biting The Dust

2011-09-25T00:11:00.001-07:00

This is mixed news: it’s wonderful that the Libyans are finally (after all these decades) ousting that wretch Gaddafi from power, but it’s a heartbreak that so many lives are being shed like water.

Libya's NTC troops enter pro-Gaddafi city of Sirte

Libya's interim government forces have made major progress in their attack on Sirte, one of the last strongholds of Muammar Gaddafi' loyalists.

Gunfire was heard and black smoke was seen rising as National Transitional Council (NTC) fighters moved to within 1km (0.5 miles) from the city centre.

The troops regrouped as night fell, preparing for a new assault in the morning, a BBC correspondent says.

Sirte is Col Gaddafi's birthplace, but it is not known if he is in the city.

The city has always been a hugely symbolic target for the NTC, and it seems close to being won, reports the BBC's Alastair Leithead, who is with anti-Gaddafi forces in Sirte.

Most of you are likely familiar with this maniac, but for those of you who have a cursory knowledge of this particular despot, Muammar Gaddaf is:

commonly known as Muammar Gaddafi or Colonel Gaddafi, was the autocratic ruler of Libya from 1969, when he seized power in a military coup, to August 2011, when his regime collapsed. In August 2011, as a result of the 2011 Libyan civil war and the creation of the National Transitional Council, his government lost most of Libya by a NATO-backed opposition force. By the end of August 2011 Gaddafi had lost almost all domestic and international political recognition as well as the majority of Libyan territory. His 42-year rule prior to the Civil War makes him the fourth longest-ruling non-royal leader since 1900, as well as the longest-ruling Arab leader. He variously styled himself as 'the Brother Leader', 'Guide of the Revolution' and the 'King of Kings'.

After seizing power in 1969, he abolished the Libyan Constitution of 1951 and imposed laws based on his political ideology. Gaddafi formulated an ideology, calling it the Third International Theory and publishing it in The Green Book. Gaddafi and his relatives took over much of the economy. Gaddafi started several wars, had a role in others, and acquired chemical weapons. The United Nations called Libya under Gaddafi a pariah state. In the 1980s, countries around the world imposed sanctions against Gaddafi. Six days after the capture of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein by United States troops,^[9] Gaddafi renounced Tripoli’s weapons of mass destruction (WMD) programs and welcomed international inspections to verify that he would follow through on the commitment. A leading advocate for a United States of Africa, he served as Chairperson of the African Union (AU) from 2 February 2009 to 31 January 2010.

Like most of history’s villains, he did a little good here and there:

During Gaddafi's period of rule many of Libya's human development indicators improved significantly. By 2010, Libya had the highest GDP per capita, Education Index, and Human Development Index in Africa as well as some of the best health indicators in the continent.

But like most ham-fisted tyrants, he over-estimated himself and overreached, bringing him down to his current situation:

In February 2011, early in the Arab Spring, a protest movement spread across Libya. Gaddafi responded by dispatching military and plainclothes paramilitary to the streets to attack demonstrators. The unrest quickly spiraled out of control and deteriorated into a civil war. On 23 August 2011, Gaddafi lost control of Tripoli, and effective control of Libya with the rebels' capture of the Bab al-Azizia compound.

The International Criminal Court issued arrest warrants on 27 June 2011 for Gaddafi, his son Saif al-Islam, and his brother-in-law Abdullah al-Senussi, concerning crimes against humanity. Interpol has also issued an arrest warrant for him for crimes against humanity. The United Kingdom, United States, Germany and France have recently unfrozen total amount of US$6.6 billion of his assets and assigned them in humanitarian aid for Libya.

Oh, how the mighty asshole is fallen!

His resume is a house of horrors, enough to gag the strong of stomach. Name a human right, he’s violated it. From quelling dissent to modern day ethnic cleansing. His imposition of Sharia law is not for the faint of heart:

Libya's society became increasingly Islamic during Gaddafi's rule. His "purification laws" were put into effect in 1994, punishing theft by the amputation of limbs, and fornication and adultery by flogging. Under the Libyan constitution, homosexual relations are punishable by up to 5 years in jail. A Westerner was shocked in 2005 to see Libyan society, saying it was:

... a country without alcohol, where the population abides by strict codes of male-female conduct that require both sexes to stay virgins until marriage—there are no dance clubs, no bars, no young couples strolling down the street, holding hands...I go in search of the town hotspot and discover it to be the local internet café, where crowds of young men play video games, enter English-language chat rooms, and examine—however surreptitiously—Western porn sites. It takes me a few minutes to notice that there’s not a single woman in the place. Away from the progressive cities of Tripoli and Benghazi, women stay largely in the home, out of sight. A local man, Mahmud, tells me that women here aren’t allowed to see or interact with males outside of their immediate family, including any would-be husband."

And the usually milquetoast UN has actually issued a warrant for once:

The UN referred the massacres of unarmed civilians to the International Criminal Court. Among the crimes being investigated by the prosecution was whether Gaddafi purchased and authorized the use of Viagra-like drugs among soldiers for the purpose of raping women and instilling fear. His government's heavy-handed approach to quelling the protests was characterized by the International Federation for Human Rights as a strategy of scorched earth. The acts of "indiscriminate killings of civilians" was charged as crimes against humanity, as defined in Article 7 of the Rome Statute of the International Criminal Court.

This guy was simply everyone’s nightmare except his own:

On the Muslim prophet Muhammad's birthday in 1973, Gaddafi delivered his famous "Five-Point Address" which officially implemented Sharia. Gaddafi's ideology was largely based on Nasserism, blending Arab nationalism,aspects of the welfare state, and what Gaddafi termed "popular democracy", or more commonly "direct, popular democracy". He called this system "Islamic socialism", as he disfavored the atheistic quality of communism. While he permitted private control over small companies, the government controlled the larger ones. Welfare, "liberation" (or "emancipation" depending on the translation),and education was emphasized. He also imposed a system of Islamic morals and outlawed alcohol and gambling. School vacations were canceled to allow the teaching of Gaddafi's ideology in the summer of 1973.

Would you be freaked out living there? I sure would. Here’s some more crazy shit:

Gaddafi is known for erratic statements, and commentators often express uncertainty about what is sarcasm and what is simply incoherent. Over the course of his four-decade rule, he accumulated a wide variety of eccentric and often contradictory statements. He once said that HIV was "a peace virus, not an aggressive virus" and assured attendees at the African Union that "if you are straight you have nothing to fear from AIDS".He also said that the H1N1 virus was a biological weapon manufactured by a foreign military, and assured Africans that the tsetse fly and mosquito were "God's armies which will protect us against colonialists". Should these 'enemies' come to Africa, "they will get malaria and sleeping sickness".

And just to emphasize how nuts this assclown is/was:

Gaddafi has been an unabashed supporter of Islam, often with blatant disregard for religious tolerance^.He said that Islam is the one true faith and that those who do not follow Islam are "losers". On another instance, he said that the Christian Bible was a "forgery" and that Jesus Christ was a messenger for the sons of Israel only. In 2006, he predicted Europe would become a Muslim continent within a few decades as a result of its growing Arab population. He endorsed the concept of a peaceful Muslim nation-state. Gaddafi expressed violent hostility towards Israel and the Jewish people throughout his career. At first, he expelled Jews from Libya and sided with Arab states for the elimination of the state of Israel. He funded and supported governments and paramilitary organizations that fought Israel. He said Arab nations that negotiate with Israel are "cowardly", and on multiple occasions, he has encouraged Palestinians to rise up against Israel. He believes in conspiracy theories that Israeli agents had assassinated John F. Kennedy and that Barack Obama's foreign policy was influenced by fears of being assassinated by Israel. Since 2007, he has suggested a single-state solution to the Israeli–Palestinian conflict, at first saying "This is the fundamental solution, or else the Jews will be annihilated in the future, because the Palestinians have [strategic] depth". In 2009, he moderated his proposal in a New York Times article, saying a single-state solution would "move beyond old conflicts and look to a unified future based on shared culture and respect."

I don’t normally advocate harsh measures, but the sooner this asswipe is in the ground, the better off the world will be. Or, as old Billy Shakespeare put it, “nothing became his life like the leaving of it.”

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Twofer Funny–Paul The Alien

2011-09-20T13:48:00.001-07:00

I just saw this recently, and I thought the film was HI-larious.

Trailer 1:

My favorite part is (of course!) when Kristen Wiig (as the blinkered Ruth Buggs) gets into an argument with Paul (the alien, voiced by Seth Rogan) about Intelligent Design:

It’s an outstanding comedy, and everyone in the cast shines (though there is a continuity problem: see if you can spot it on your own).

Enjoy.

Who Can Second-Guess The Guessers?

2011-09-18T00:31:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It’s irritating, to find these puff pieces that are completely devoid of anything other than the good old “there-are-places-science-can’t-go” – broad appeals to ignorance that seem thoughtful to the thoughtless.

A Point of View: Can religion tell us more than science?

Too many athiests miss the point of religion, it's about how we live and not what we believe, writes John Gray.

And right out the gate, they misspell atheists, which pretty much strips out much of what the author thought of as ‘deep and insightful’

When he recounts the story of his conversion to Catholicism in his autobiography A Sort of Life, Graham Greene writes that he went for instruction to Father Trollope, a very tall and very fat man who had once been an actor in the West End.

Trollope was a convert who became a priest and led a highly ascetic life, and Greene didn't warm to him very much, at least to begin with.

Yet the writer came to feel that in dealing with his instructor he was faced with "the challenge of an inexplicable goodness". It was this impression - rather than any of the arguments the devout Father presented to the writer for the existence of God - that eventually led to Greene's conversion.

The arguments that were patiently rehearsed by Father Trollope faded from his memory, and Greene had no interest in retrieving them. "I cannot be bothered to remember," he writes. "I accept."

It's clear that what Green accepted wasn't what he called "those unconvincing philosophical arguments". But what was it that he had accepted?

We tend to assume that religion is a question of what we believe or don't believe. It's an assumption with a long history in western philosophy, which has been reinforced in recent years by the dull debate on atheism.

This is just another ‘novel’ take on an approach to appeals to incredulity.

In this view belonging to a religion involves accepting a set of beliefs, which are held before the mind and assessed in terms of the evidence that exists for and against them. Religion is then not fundamentally different from science, both seem like attempts to frame true beliefs about the world. That way of thinking tends to see science and religion as rivals, and it then becomes tempting to conclude that there's no longer any need for religion.

This irritating trope is what angers most atheists: the effort to put religion and science on equal terms, when they are anything but equals. There IS a fundamental difference between religion and science – religion is strictly guesswork, science is based on reproducible evidence.

This was the view presented by the Victorian anthropologist JG Frazer in his book The Golden Bough, a study of the myths of primitive peoples that is still in print. According to Frazer, human thought advances through a series of stages that culminate in science. Starting with magic and religion, which view the world simply as an extension of the human mind, we eventually reach the age of science in which we view the world as being ruled by universal laws.

Frazer's account has been immensely influential. It lies behind the confident assertions of the new atheists, and for many people it's just commonsense. My own view is closer to that of the philosopher Wittgenstein, who commented that Frazer was much more savage than the savages he studied.

I’d really like a show of hands on this one. Frazier? Surprisingly enough, despite my knowledge of mythology and religion, I’ve never read any of his work. And of course, the ‘new atheist’chestnut makes me think of paraphrasing the Who: “Here’s new atheist, just like the old atheist”. It’s garbage. We’re ruder now because being polite makes the religionist think they have a point.

I don't belong to any religion, but the idea that religion is a relic of primitive thinking strikes me as itself incredibly primitive.

Because of course, belief in the supernatural is…what? Advanced, complex thought? Is this guy kidding?

In most religions - polytheism, Hinduism and Buddhism, Daoism and Shinto, many strands of Judaism and some Christian and Muslim traditions - belief has never been particularly important. Practice - ritual, meditation, a way of life - is what counts. What practitioners believe is secondary, if it matters at all.

Oh, I see – so all those pogroms and massacres and tortures and rapes were just a matter of difference of opinion about ritual, meditation, and how you live?

The idea that religions are essentially creeds, lists of propositions that you have to accept, doesn't come from religion. It's an inheritance from Greek philosophy, which shaped much of western Christianity and led to practitioners trying to defend their way of life as an expression of what they believe.

Newsflash – Judaism ran in asynchronous tandem with Greek philosophy – and while there were Hellenistic Jews, the Jews were severely insular. And yes, the root core is a list of accepted propositions. Nice try at re-framing, but no cigar.

This is where Frazer and the new atheists today come in. When they attack religion they are assuming that religion is what this western tradition says it is - a body of beliefs that needs to be given a rational justification.

Why, yes it is.

Obviously, there are areas of life where having good reasons for what we believe is very important. Courts of law and medicine are evidence-based practices, which need rigorous procedures to establish the facts. The decisions of governments rest on claims about how their policies will work, and it would be useful if these claims were regularly scrutinised - though you'd be well advised not to hold your breath.

That’s because ‘belief’ in its broadest possible generalization, needs to be proven sufficient to the cause.

But many areas of life aren't like this. Art and poetry aren't about establishing facts. Even science isn't the attempt to frame true beliefs that it's commonly supposed to be. Scientific inquiry is the best method we have for finding out how the world works, and we know a lot more today than we did in the past. That doesn't mean we have to believe the latest scientific consensus. If we know anything, it's that our current theories will turn out to be riddled with errors. Yet we go on using them until we can come up with something better.

Pointing out that science isn’t ‘perfect’ is a ridiculous talking point.

Science isn't actually about belief - any more than religion is about belief. If science produces theories that we can use without believing them, religion is a repository of myth.

Bullshit. 4 out of 5 standard definitions specifically stipulate it’s about belief:

re·li·gion noun

1. a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, especially when considered as the creation of a superhuman agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs.

2. a specific fundamental set of beliefs and practices generally agreed upon by a number of persons or sects: the Christian religion; the Buddhist religion.

3.the body of persons adhering to a particular set of beliefs and practices: a world council of religions.

4. the life or state of a monk, nun, etc.: to enter religion.

5. the practice of religious beliefs; ritual observance of faith.

I’m going to skip ahead to another lynchpin that blows this puff piece right outta the water:

If Darwin's theory of evolution is even roughly right, humans aren't built to understand how the universe works. The human brain evolved under the pressures of the struggle for life.

Evolution is more than ‘roughly right’ – it’s a proven set of facts, unassailable mountains of forensic evidence. There’s no ‘roughly’ involved, except how the author tries to play the diplomat and fails miserably.

Of course, the author marches out yet another idiocy:

Science hasn't enabled us to dispense with myths. Instead it has become a vehicle for myths - chief among them, the myth of salvation through science. Many of the people who scoff at religion are sublimely confident that, by using science, humanity can march onwards to a better world.

Why do people ‘believe’ science improves the world? It’s called track record. Res ipsa loquitor.

(Snip)

Because it's a human invention, science - just like religion - will always be used for all kinds of purposes, good and bad. Unbelievers in religion who think science can save the world are possessed by a fantasy that's far more childish than any myth. The idea that humans will rise from the dead may be incredible, but no more so than the notion that "humanity" can use science to remake the world.

Newsflash: it’s already happened. Several times, in fact. We’ve managed to remake the world on multiple occasions. As to whether it’s a better world, is another debate entirely.

Evangelical atheists who want to convert the world to unbelief are copying religion at its dogmatic worst. They think human life would be vastly improved if only everyone believed as they do, when a little history shows that trying to get everyone to believe the same thing is a recipe for unending conflict.

This is really too much. It’s a thinly veiled “why-can’t-they-just-put-a-sock-in-it” coupled with a thoroughly bald-faced lie. We criticize religion – sometimes relentlessly. But dropping superstitious belief would obviously benefit the world at large. But ethics forbid that we do it by force.

The only thing I agreed with is the summation:

What we believe doesn't in the end matter very much. What matters is how we live.

And religions tend to dictate how we live. They try to tell us who to marry, what to do with our bodies, how to raise our children, legislate to gain the means to do all of these things. But somewhichway, we’re supposed to give them cart blanche to do this?

I think not.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer: PC Vs. Mac

2011-09-14T08:40:00.001-07:00

Remember this? The nightmare that was Windows Vista:

Pretty funny South-Parkian parody including Linux:

Enjoy.

September 11th–Never Let The Outrage Die

2011-09-10T23:46:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It is now been a decade since that fateful day that shattered the mirror of America straight across. When twin towers were brought down by two jets hijacked by madmen bent on wholesale destruction. We should never forget and never forgive this atrocity perpetrated, regardless of the rationale behind it. The bodies raining downwards, screaming.

The apologists are always a-flurry: the Christians, the Judaists, they will condemn Islam wholesale while giving themselves a free pass. But this is not so. It is the self-proclaimed fiat of all religions that theirs should prevail, no matter what the cost. Because after all, the reward for the poisoned fruits of their labor is in the next life, not this one. So what cost bliss? Any cost, it seems.

The afterlife: it poisons everything in this life, for the sake of an imaginary one. If any of the hijackers believed that this life was the only one we all have, would they have given theirs so freely?

Remember, remember, the 11th of September.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Twofer–American Dad

2011-09-06T21:24:00.001-07:00

Nice take-off on the famous Scarface scene:

And a funny yet eerily accurate satire of Republican spending:

Enjoy.

The Madness Of Muslim–The Commission Of Filicide

2011-09-04T00:51:00.001-07:00

It never seems to end, the constant parade of body parts and body bags. An inexorable bloody march towards some unrealistic unattainable goal set by a crazy man in the desert who thought he’d split the moon in half and rode off into the sky on a winged horse.

Witness then, the vicious vicissitudes of faith:

India mothers charged with daughters' honour killings

Police in the Indian state of Uttar Pradesh have filed preliminary charges against two women accused of killing their daughters.

The women, who were neighbours and are both Muslim, were reportedly furious with their daughters for eloping with Hindu men, police told the BBC.

Zahida, 19, and Husna, 26, were strangled last week after they returned home to make peace with their families.

The two mothers are yet to make an official response to the accusations.

One of the accused is quoted by the Indian Express newspaper as saying after being arrested, "How could they elope with Hindus? They deserved to die. We have no remorse."

Police say they are still trying to ascertain if the women assisted each other.

Zahida and Husna fell in love with two Hindu construction workers and eloped and got married before returning home to the town of Baghpat last week. Their mothers were arrested by police on Friday.

Correspondents say that marriages between Hindus and Muslims are not common in India. In rural areas especially they are frowned upon by both communities.

Last week India's Supreme Court ruled that people convicted of so-called honour killings should face the death penalty.

"It is time to stamp out these barbaric, feudal practices which are a slur on our nation," the court said.

According to one recent study, hundreds of people are killed each year in India for falling in love or marrying against their families' wishes.

Convictions for so-called honour killings usually carry life sentences.

These were two ordinary women – there was nothing special about them, just some more folks who were just ‘trying to get by’. Likelihood is strong that prior to these outrages, they were just faceless individuals blending in with the masses. Chances are also good that their neighbors would never have guessed that either would have committed such heinous crimes. So the next time anyone lifts up a finger, and gets ready to lecture you (or even if it is you yourself) on how most religious folk are benign, remember: this is another of the many prices paid for accommodationism – the watering of the sands with human blood, the psychotic need to control the womanhood of daughters; the bended knee to their deity is slick with crimson.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–‘Touch My Monkey!’

2011-08-31T23:29:00.001-07:00

Bizarre but hysterical:

Enjoy.

Even More On The Madness Of Muslim–It Is Always Too Much

2011-08-27T22:58:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It is no secret that I despise religions equally: I am an equal opportunity blasphemer. I don’t bang away at Judaism, because it’s become a minor footnote compared to the Big Two of the Three Abrahamic monotheisms. But there is a sliding scale. Christianity has been diluted somewhat over the centuries, and even though there are still some very, VERY scary individuals wandering about shouting gloom and doom from that particular piece of nastiness, Islam still rates in barbarism as numero uno with a bullet.

This following sort of incident, for instance, doesn’t occur on US soil:

After the Taliban: Swat women on changing life

The situation in Swat was normal until the Taliban appeared and destroyed the peace of Swat.

They started their inhuman activities, they slaughtered people in the squares of Mingora and they killed so many innocent people. Their first target was schools, especially girls schools. They blasted so many girls schools - more than 400 schools and more than 50,000 students suffered under the Taliban.

We were afraid the Taliban might throw acid on our faces or might kidnap us. They were barbarians, they could do anything. So at that time some of us would go to school in plain clothes, not in school uniform, just to pretend we are not students, and we hid our books under our shawls.

After the army operation the situation has become normal and the army is trying to rebuild good quality schools, but we want the schools to be rebuilt quickly because students are facing problems. It's very hot and they can't study in tents. Now everyone is free to come to school and the girls are now not afraid of the Taliban or anything that will ruin the peace of Swat.

When the Taliban came to Swat they banned women from going to the market and they banned shopping, but they did not know that women, whether from the East or West love shopping.

These are hairy-eyed fanatics, who have the will to rule. These aren’t just ‘a few crazies making the religion look bad’ (as the popular excuse goes) – these are a LOT of nutjobs, sociopaths looking for an excuse to tailor the world to their own convenience. In fact, there are 25,000 of them in Afghanistan alone. And they’re stealth crazies: they hide amid the population, using civilians as shields when someone in their right mind comes looking for them.

And people are afraid to turn them in. Why? Because shit like this happens, not only is the ‘kaffir’ slain, but grief and barbarism is visited upon their families:

The son of assassinated Punjab governor Salman Taseer, who was killed in January for opposing the blasphemy law, has been abducted, Pakistan police say.

Shahbaz Taseer's car was intercepted by four men in Lahore city's upscale Gulberg area on Friday.

It is not known who seized Mr Taseer but his family said they had received "threats from extremist groups".

Governor Salman Taseer was assassinated by his own bodyguard Mumtaz Qadri as he was about to get into his car.

"Four men in a car intercepted Shahbaz Taseer's car," news agency AFP quoted police emergency official Syed Mumtaz as saying.

"They overpowered him at gunpoint and forcibly put him in their car and sped away," he said.

There has been no word as to Shabaz’s welfare. I’d say there’s serious doubt as to whether he’ll survive this.

As religions go, they’re all barbaric garbage – but there is a distinct difference between a trash can, a small landfill, and a garbage scow. Just as there are gradations of terror. The vague worry that an invisible someone just might be watching differs proportionately to armed squads ready to enforce that invisible someone’s rules at sword or gunpoint. A world of difference.

In this constantly changing, much smaller world, these differences need to be gone, or we will all become rats in a bag, tearing each other to pieces over some imagined superiority.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Twofer–Mad TV

2011-08-24T17:57:00.001-07:00

I’ve never ever seen Jackass – and it is highly unlikely I ever will. However, Will Sasso’s impression of Kenny Rogers in his very own Jackass is…well, it’s very funny, in a sick way:

And for a classic spoof on the iPod commercials:

Enjoy.

If Your Faith Comes First, You Should Not Be In Office…

2011-08-20T22:27:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

“If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.” – Anatole France

While busily combing the Interwebs for tonight’s piece, I came across this puff piece at Belief.net – it’s your general “oh-why-oh-why-can’t-these-effin’-atheists-just-shut-up?” generalizations. And guess who it’s about? Why, your pal and mine, the presidential wannabe I belittled last week. So of course, some outraged Christian is defending some politician’s ass-grabbing voter-pandering rubbish (that is, until he gets caught doing some not-so-Christian behavior, then it’s “we don’t know this guy, Rick WHO?”).

First, the general disclaimer:

OK. First off, let’s be clear: I take a philosophical back seat to no one in promoting the right of any American to worship — or not — the God or gods or Force or assorted plants, celestial bodies, etc., of their choice.

Yay.

And if they don’t believe in any of those things, I don’t have a problem with them putting up billboards, carrying signs or shouting from the public square their convictions as atheists or agnostics, either.

The fact that there needs to be a qualifier for this, bespeaks a sad state of affairs for this country.

This is America. Within our Constitution and the Bill of Rights are guarantees for both the practice and energetic espousal of religion, and freedom from religious persecution — whether against a particular group of believers, or those who do not believe.

Can I get a hallelujah? I can’t? Oh well…

Here’s where it gets really sticky:

But the pendulum has swung crazily too far when it comes to cries of “separation of church and state” and every American’s right — even those running for elective offices — to live by their religious principles and express them.

No way. As the title of this piece indicates: if your faith comes first, you should NOT be in office. Because if swearing an oath to the constitution is superseded by your religious affiliation, how can you be trusted to make objective decisions that affect millions of people who are not of your faith? You can’t be trusted with that. History proves that maxim correct. We have mountains of historical evidence that states that, in no uncertain terms, religious fanatics are inherently untrustworthy. Then the author goes out on a limb here:

Case in point: This weekend’s stadium prayer event spearheaded by Texas Gov. Rick Perry. He had, apparently, the audacity to look at the nation’s dismal state — a black hole of rising debt that led to an historic loss of the country’s top credit rating, deep unemployment, wars that continue to bleed us of lives and treasure, and a seeming crisis of morals and morale — and call for believers to fast, repent and pray for America.

It’s risible. Fasting, repenting, prayer? When has any of this had any other effect, other than to stroke the egos of co-dependent sheeple who have inherited inferiority complexes from their superstitious mumbo-jumbo about original sin? They might as well take the advice of some joker on Pope-rah about the ‘Secret’ or ‘The Power of Positive Thinking’. Or order a self-help book.

And, as if throwing gasoline on the already self-immolating critics that arose, he and others had the gall to close their prayers with mention of Jesus. That is what Christians, do, you know – invoke the name of the founder and namesake of their faith. People of other faiths were invited, too. Perhaps there was a conspicuous absence by non-Christians, but that was a choice, too.

Now the author is simply indulging in hyperbolic rhetoric. The actual fact is, if it was an event on anyone but the taxpayer’s dime, who really cares? Not a whole lot.

But I wonder: would that be any less “offensive” had a Muslim taken the stage to open a public prayer with “In the name of Allah, the most beneficent” and closing them with “O Allah! Accept our invocation”? Or, for that matter, a Rastafarian’s “Blessed is the name of Our Lord God Jah Ras Tafari,” a Hindu’s “We worship the three-eyed One, Lord Shiva,” a Buddhist proclaiming “I take refuge in the Buddha, the Dharma, and the supreme Sangha,” a Native American punctuating ritual smoke with “O Great Spirit of our ancestors, I raise my pipe to you,” or a Wiccan chanting “Holy Earth Mother, flesh of the world. . . .”

Personally, I take offense at all of the above. Because it’s all crap. Which makes an excessive display of that thing called ‘faith’ more disgusting. But hey…I usually keep my mouth shut on the topic until addressed, or when I happen to overhear something especially stupid. That’s when I chirp up. But that’s just me.

Smooth as gravel, the author then declaims:

A chief executive — of a state or of our nation –bringing 30,000 fellow believers to pray in an arena may seem over-the-top today, but leaders calling willing citizens to prayer is hardly new.

A., hell yes it’s way over the top. B., in America, leaders calling willing citizens to prayer is indicative of a distinct bias, and chances are very strong said leader isn’t going to be leading Muslims or Jews in prayer. C., that was a violation of SOCAS, whether it happens now or in the past. Argument from tradition is an argument from shit.

In our increasingly secularized age, though, anyone who believes in moral absolutes, supports traditional marriage or abhors the millions of potential lives lost to abortion (both interfaith issues, by the way) gets labeled “hater.”

Newsflash: NO. These are not ‘interfaith’ issues, these are human issues. And again – if your duty as an objective officer of the constitution takes a backseat to your ‘faith’ (or whatever you want to call your rigmarole), then no, you shouldn’t be in office.

Disagree with those stands? No problem, speak out. But it seems when it comes to sharing faith and its values, well, that justifies a tsunami of hyperbole and calls for repression from a vocal minority.

So, wait…what exactly is he talking about? You mean THESE crazy lefties?

Despite the warm greeting Perry received inside Reliant Stadium, not everyone was pleased.

Brandy Deason was among a group of protesters outside who chanted and waved signs in opposition to what they called an unconstitutional mixing of church and state.

“I am happy to let people know it’s not OK for a government official to hold a religious meeting to try to solve our problems,” said Deason, an atheist. “Logic and problem-solving is the only way to go with this, not by prayer.”

What a hypocritical asshole. He tells people it’s okay to do this, and then he vilifies them for doing it? It’s not a surprising pattern: people (especially when they’re religious) practice double-standards, and recite the selective highlights, and how dare anyone criticize anything when belief is involved? And belief doesn’t move mountains; Mohammed has to walk to it despite his declamations. It’s all traditional pop-psychobabble nonsense with some poetic shared soliloquies to make the ineffective feel effective.

So in monosyllabic content: faith bad, facts good. No more monotheistic mollycoddling. Prayer doesn’t work, repenting is just a slab of that old time religious guilt, and fasting is simply self-deprivation.

And Perry saying, “It’s time to hand this thing over to God, and say ‘God, you’re just gonna have to fix this” is just another way of saying “I’m not going to do jack shit, and hide behind religion while I’m not doing anything.”

And those people, my friends, are a dime a dozen in this country. We have enough helpless folks struggling, we don’t need another one in a high political office. We need someone who will actually do something besides pander.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Twofer–The Mr. Bill Show

2011-08-16T20:04:00.001-07:00

Here’s an oldie but goody – the Mr. Bill Show!

Mr. Bill on safety:

Mr. Bill Goes To Washington (we’d be better off with a clay doll than a Republican anyways):

Though I have to wonder what is says about our culture, that we laugh at the misfortunes of a clay doll?

Enjoy.

Scary News–The Evangelists Are Eyeing The Presidency Again..

2011-08-14T00:01:00.001-07:00

And once again, it’s some clown from Texas:

On September 28, 2009, at 1:40 p.m., God's messengers visited Rick Perry.

PSSSTTT!! There’s nobody up there!

On this day, the Lord's messengers arrived in the form of two Texas pastors, Tom Schlueter of Arlington and Bob Long of San Marcos, who called on Perry in the governor's office inside the state Capitol. Schlueter and Long both oversee small congregations, but they are more than just pastors. They consider themselves modern-day apostles and prophets, blessed with the same gifts as Old Testament prophets or New Testament apostles.

The short version is that they’re utter frauds, then. Because all those fairy tales are so much garbage.

The pastors told Perry of God's grand plan for Texas.

Oh yeah, because Texas is mentioned by name in their book! Oh, waitaminnit…no it isn’t.

A chain of powerful prophecies had proclaimed that Texas was "The Prophet State," anointed by God to lead the United States into revival and Godly government. And the governor would have a special role.

(Point at head, whistle while rotating index finger)

The day before the meeting, Schlueter had received a prophetic message from Chuck Pierce, an influential prophet from Denton, Texas. God had apparently commanded Schlueter - through Pierce - to "pray by lifting the hand of the one I show you that is in the place of civil rule."

Con man or crazy? You decide.

Schlueter had prayed before his congregation: "Lord Jesus I bring to you today Gov. Perry.... I am just bringing you his hand and I pray Lord that he will grasp ahold of it. For if he does you will use him mightily.”

A lot of people are being used – but not by their imaginary sky daddy.

And grasp ahold the governor did. At the end of their meeting, Perry asked the two pastors to pray over him. As the pastors would later recount, the Lord spoke prophetically as Schlueter laid his hands on Perry, their heads bowed before a painting of the Battle of the Alamo. Schlueter "declared over [Perry] that there was a leadership role beyond Texas and that Texas had a role beyond what people understand," Long later told his congregation.

It may be unconstitutional, but my opinion is that any politician that has people ‘pray’ over them should be in mandatory retirement. Immediately.

So you have to wonder: Is Rick Perry God's man for president?

No, he’s a religious puppet with a hand up his ass.

Schlueter, Long and other prayer warriors in a little-known but increasingly influential movement at the periphery of American Christianity seem to think so.

Wait – ‘prayer warriors’? Are you effin’ kiddin’ me?

The movement is called the New Apostolic Reformation. Believers fashion themselves modern-day prophets and apostles. They have taken Pentecostalism, with its emphasis on ecstatic worship and the supernatural, and given it an adrenaline shot.

More like smoking crack.

The movement's top prophets and apostles believe they have a direct line to God.

So…they’re phoning it in? Ordering pizza? Be serious.

Through them, they say, He communicates specific instructions and warnings.

And it all sounds suspiciously like what they want.

When mankind fails to heed the prophecies, the results can be catastrophic: earthquakes in Japan, terrorist attacks in New York, and economic collapse. On the other hand, they believe their God-given decrees have ended mad cow disease in Germany and produced rain in drought-stricken Texas.

Which of course they have zero evidence to back it up with.

Their beliefs can tend toward the bizarre.

All supernatural beliefs are bizarre.

Some consider Freemasonry a "demonic stronghold" tantamount to witchcraft.

Another thing besides prayer that fails.

The Democratic Party, one prominent member believes, is controlled by Jezebel and three lesser demons.

Wait – Jezebel? A demon? Here in the 21st century?

Some prophets even claim to have seen demons at public meetings.

And of course, since our culture has been brainwashed to accept this horseshit, nobody points out that these cats are mentally deranged.

They've taken biblical literalism to an extreme. In Texas, they engage in elaborate ceremonies involving branding irons, plumb lines and stakes inscribed with biblical passages driven into the earth of every Texas county.

That actually sounds Druidic.

If they simply professed unusual beliefs, movement leaders wouldn't be remarkable. But what makes the New Apostolic Reformation movement so potent is its growing fascination with infiltrating politics and government. The new prophets and apostles believe Christians - certain Christians - are destined to not just take "dominion" over government, but stealthily climb to the commanding heights of what they term the "Seven Mountains" of society, including the media and the arts and entertainment world. They believe they're intended to lord over it all. As a first step, they're leading an "army of God" to commandeer civilian government.

If they’re going to do it via ‘prayer warriors’, well then…they don’t have a prayer (entendre intended).

In all the media attention surrounding Perry's flirtation with a run for the presidency, the governor's budding relationship with the leaders of the New Apostolic Reformation movement has largely escaped notice.

Of course it has. That ridiculous adage about not discussing politics or religion at the dinner table – or anywhere else.

But perhaps not for long. Perry has given self-proclaimed prophets and apostles leading roles in The Response, a much-publicized Christians-only prayer rally that Perry is organizing at Houston's Reliant Stadium on Aug. 6.

Glad I missed that collection of crazy.

The Response has engendered widespread criticism of its deliberate blurring of church and state and for the involvement of the American Family Association, labeled a "hate group" by the Southern Poverty Law Center for its leadership's homophobic and anti-Muslim statements. But it's the involvement of New Apostolic leaders that's more telling about Perry's convictions and campaign strategy.

As we have seen, love is the excuse for their hate.

Eight members of The Response "leadership team" are affiliated with the New Apostolic Reformation movement. They're employed or associated with groups like TheCall or the International House of Prayer (IHOP), Kansas City-based organizations at the forefront of the movement. The long list of The Response's official endorsers - posted on the event's website - reads like a Who's Who of the apostolic-prophetic crowd, including movement founder C. Peter Wagner.

These people are the enemy. Know the enemy.

In a recent interview with the Observer, Schlueter explained that The Response is divinely inspired. "The government of our nation was basically founded on biblical principles," he says. "When you have a governmental leader call a time of fasting and prayer, I believe that there has been a significant shift in our understanding as far as who is ultimately in charge of our nation - which we believe God is."

Predictable. And sad. More of their revisionist manure. If their god is in charge, then nobody is.

Perry certainly knows how to speak the language of the new apostles. The genesis of The Response, Perry says, comes from the Book of Joel, an obscure slice of the Old Testament that's popular with the apostolic crowd.

"With the economy in trouble, communities in crisis and people adrift in a sea of moral relativism, we need God's help," Perry says in a video message on The Response website. "That's why I'm calling on Americans to pray and fast like Jesus did and as God called the Israelites to do in the Book of Joel."

Ah yes. The old finger-pointing trick. What Perry doesn’t seem to realize, is that moral relativism is a standard by which Christianity flies. I’m going to skip around to the astounding bits:

One of the primary tasks of the new prophets and apostles is to hear God's will and then act on it. Sometimes this means changing the world supernaturally. Wagner tells of the time in October 2001 when, at a huge prayer conference in Germany, he "decreed that mad cow disease would come to an end in Europe and the UK." As it turned out, the last reported case of human mad cow disease had occurred the day before. "I am not implying that I have any inherent supernatural power," Wagner wrote. "I am implying that when apostles hear the word of God clearly and when they decree His will, history can change."

First off, you ARE implying that you have some inherent supernatural power – it’s called clairaudience. Secondly, there was a report in Japan in late 2001. Also a report of one in 2004. So still wrong. And it’s not as much an epidemic as they’re hyping it up. So a load of crap – no surprise.

Oh, here’s another ‘goodie’:

Last year Jacobs warned that if America didn't return to biblical values and support Israel, God would cause a "tumbling of the economy and dark days will come," according to Charisma. To drive the point home, Jacobs and other right-wing allies - including The Response organizers Lou Engle and California pastor Jim Garlow - organized a 40-day "Pray and Act" effort in the lead-up to the 2010 elections.

Hey, I saw it coming too. Didn’t need any writing on the wall. It was pretty obvious.

Oh, and here’s the crazy cat lady:

Patterson claims to have seen demons with her own eyes. In 2009, at a prophetic meeting in Houston, Patterson says she saw the figure of Jezebel and "saw Jezebel's skirt lifted to expose tiny Baal, Asherah, and a few other spirits. There they were - small, cowering, trembling little spirits that were only ankle high on Jezebel's skinny legs."

Likely they’re spiking the punch with hallucinogenics – or she’s just batshit crazy. And like attracts like.

Read the rest of the article. You don’t require me to interpret it for you. But for myself, these people give me the shudders. People who are hearing voices and having visions need medicating, not political power. Perry might turn out to be an also-ran, but he could also become a dark horse.

So keep a wary eye out, and speak up at the first opportunity. Denounce these gibbering weirdos as the nutcases they are. Stump if you have to, but be heard.

The more of us that speak up, the better likelihood there is of being heard.

Till the next post then.

Wednesday Twofer–Monty Python And The Holy Grail

2011-08-10T07:54:00.001-07:00

For some old classics, here’s a scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail (“Bring Out Your Dead”):

And this clip is symbolic of when I debate with theists online (hint: I’m Arthur):

Enjoy.

Oh Come All Ye Unfaithful…

2011-08-06T22:58:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

1. In the beginning Man created God; and in the image of Man created he him.
2. And Man gave unto God a multitude of names,that he might be Lord of all the earth when it was suited to Man
3. And on the seven millionth day Man rested and did lean heavily on his God and saw that it was good. Jethro Tull, Aqualung

Here’s a fascinating little human interest story:

Dutch rethink Christianity for a doubtful world

The Rev Klaas Hendrikse can offer his congregation little hope of life after death, and he's not the sort of man to sugar the pill.

The Exodus Church is part of the mainstream Protestant Church in the Netherlands

An imposing figure in black robes and white clerical collar, Mr Hendrikse presides over the Sunday service at the Exodus Church in Gorinchem, central Holland.

It is part of the mainstream Protestant Church in the Netherlands (PKN), and the service is conventional enough, with hymns, readings from the Bible, and the Lord's Prayer. But the message from Mr Hendrikse's sermon seems bleak - "Make the most of life on earth, because it will probably be the only one you get".

"Personally I have no talent for believing in life after death," Mr Hendrikse says. "No, for me our life, our task, is before death."

Nor does Klaas Hendrikse believe that God exists at all as a supernatural thing.

I’m unsure what to make of the hymn-singing, bible reading and prayers. And Klaas actually equivocates by changing definitions:

"When it happens, it happens down to earth, between you and me, between people, that's where it can happen. God is not a being at all... it's a word for experience, or human experience."

But he’s another Myther. Hurrah!

Mr Hendrikse describes the Bible's account of Jesus's life as a mythological story about a man who may never have existed, even if it is a valuable source of wisdom about how to lead a good life.

And of course, he attracts detractors:

His book Believing in a Non-Existent God led to calls from more traditionalist Christians for him to be removed. However, a special church meeting decided his views were too widely shared among church thinkers for him to be singled out.

Sense is seeping in, slowly but surely:

A study by the Free University of Amsterdam found that one-in-six clergy in the PKN and six other smaller denominations was either agnostic or atheist.

It sounds more and more like the church I wouldn’t mind attending – had I the inclination to do so.

The Rev Kirsten Slattenaar, Exodus Church's regular priest, also rejects the idea - widely considered central to Christianity - that Jesus was divine as well as human.

"I think 'Son of God' is a kind of title," she says. "I don't think he was a god or a half god. I think he was a man, but he was a special man because he was very good in living from out of love, from out of the spirit of God he found inside himself."

Well, the mythical man-child also named himself ‘Son of Man’ as well – but that could very well be a Gnostic interpolation that slipped by the incessant censors.

Mrs Slattenaar acknowledges that she's changing what the Church has said, but, she insists, not the "real meaning of Christianity".

She says that there "is not only one answer" and complains that "a lot of traditional beliefs are outside people and have grown into rigid things that you can't touch any more".

And this little snippet says it all:

"In our society it's called 'somethingism'," he says. "There must be 'something' between heaven and earth, but to call it 'God', and even 'a personal God', for the majority of Dutch is a bridge too far.

Ah, the schisms of –isms, I’d rather have something that ends with an –asm. But that’s just me.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Andy Richter Controls The Universe

2011-08-03T19:56:00.001-07:00

I think the joke was that nobody does.

On bigotry:

A simple mistake leads to a lot of weirdness:

Enjoy.

The Breivik Manifesto–Aryan Delusions Lead To Blood…

2011-07-30T22:07:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It’s another one of those real life horror shows: some nutjob gets him/herself all lathered up based on the slimmest of possibilities, and it ends in tears and blood and grief…

Investigators believe massacre accused Anders Behring Breivik had surgery to look 'Aryan'

THE far-right fanatic Anders Behring Breivik, who murdered 77 people in Norway, had plastic surgery to make himself look like an Aryan Nazi, the head of the country's intelligence service believes.

"He must have had a facelift," said Janne Kristiansen, head of the PST, Norway's domestic intelligence agency. "You do not have that Aryan look naturally in Norway. Hitler would have had him on posters. He has the perfect, classic Aryan face."

Breivik's friends have suggested that he had plastic surgery to his chin, nose and forehead in the United States.

Security chiefs also think that Breivik, 32, wanted his 1,500-page "manifesto", which details his preparations for the attacks, to be "like a Da Vinci Code novel" with mysteries that will keep him in the public eye for years.

The disclosures come as Scotland Yard investigates links between Breivik and the English Defence League (EDL) after it emerged that he had joined an offshoot of the far-right group. He was a member of the Norwegian Defence League (NDL) which is controlled by convicted football hooligans in Britain.

Officers from the national domestic extremism unit of the Metropolitan police are expected to examine footage of EDL protests in Britain to see if Breivik took part. He killed eight people with a car bomb in Oslo before moving on to the island of Utoya where he shot dead 69 others at a youth camp.

Norwegian police revealed yesterday that he had considered attacking other targets, reportedly including a royal palace and the ruling Labour party's headquarters. North sea oil rigs and nuclear power plants in Britain have been put on alert after Breivik identified them as potential targets. During a 10-hour interrogation on Friday, he asked how many people he killed in his July 22 rampage. Police said he "showed no emotion" when told.

Norwegian intelligence agents are poring over his anti-Muslim manifesto. They believe it may contain riddles - possibly including Breivik's description of a meeting of Knights Templar in London in 2002 - to perpetuate his myth.

Referring to the Dan Brown bestseller, a source said: "He wants it to be like a Da Vinci Code novel. He has created a mystery and as long as that mystery is there his message will remain in the public domain."

The Sunday Times has established that Breivik was a member of the NDL until this year. "He was a member," said Lena Andreassen, a former NDL leader. "I kicked him out because he had extremist views."

This is a constantly recurring theme lately. Fanatics becoming berserk because of the actions of other fanatics, which in turn incites yet other fanatics to act. It is a bloody cycle, an ongoing ideological war with too many casualties that makes so little sense.

Breivik was one such fanatic. He modified his features with surgery to look more ‘Aryan’, and was convinced that Sharia law was coming to Europe. He carefully and systematically crafted an entire psychotic house of cards, wrote 1500 words about his obsession, and came out firing.

For example, although Mr. Breivik says he fears “the extinction of the Nordic genotypes,” racial hygiene is not high on his agenda. He wants to expel, not kill, Muslims in Europe, and he does not mind Jews and non-Muslim Asians. Similarly, while Mr. Breivik says he is “extremely proud” of his “Odinistic/Norse heritage,” he is not a Norwegian nationalist — his “declaration of independence” applies to all of Europe. And while he is Christian, he admits that “I’m not going to pretend I’m a very religious person.”

I think that’s mighty white of Breivik – he just wants to ‘shoo’ Muslims away, not harm them. Oh, and he invokes what I like to call the ‘McVeigh defense’ – “I’m really, really not all that religious” is an excuse these wankers use to minimize the impact of their actions on their ideology of choice.

Don’t get me wrong – I am as foursquare against Islam as any atheist (maybe more so than most), but mass evacuations of a religious group from multiple countries? Does this sound at all familiar to anyone? And how would that determination be made? What if said Muslims were practicing Taqiyya?

Oh, and there’s more to this cat’s crazy:

Breivik condemns Pope Benedict XVI for his dialogue with Islam: "Pope Benedict has abandoned Christianity and all Christian Europeans and is to be considered a cowardly, incompetent, corrupt and illegitimate Pope." It will thus be necessary, writes Breivik, to overthrow the Protestant and Catholic hierarchies, after which a "Great Christian Congress" would set up a new European Church. He has also condemned Christian missionary activity in India as it would lead to the "total destruction of the Hindu faith and culture", and he expresses support for the Hindutva movement against Indian Communist movements.

I’m all for overthrowing the anachronistic religious hierarchies, but to replace them with a ‘Great Christian Congress’? Yeah, he’s not all that religious? My homesick ass he’s not. The scarier thing is, he sounds a great deal like most of the Republican theocrats over here, sans the racism:

Following his apprehension, Breivik was characterized by officials as being a right-wing extremist. The acting police chief said the suspect’s Internet postings "suggest that he has some political traits directed toward the right, and Islamophobia views, but if that was a motivation for the actual act remains to be seen." He was at first described by many in the media as a Christian Fundamentalist, Christian terrorist, nationalist and right-wing extremist. Although self-identified as a Christian, others have questioned whether Breivik was in fact a fundamentalist Christian or even a Christian at all.

(OY! No True Scotsman!)

He claims that the European Union is a project to create "Eurabia" and describes the 1999 NATO bombing of Yugoslavia as being authorised by "criminal western European and American leaders".The Jerusalem Post describes him as pro-Israel and strongly opposed to Islam, and asserts that his manifesto includes "extreme screed of Islamophobia" and "far-right Zionism".

Unseen wheels are seen a'-turnin’? Conspiracy wackaloon.

Breivik claimed he had contact with the English Defence League (EDL) and claimed to have been involved with the Norwegian Defence League (NDL), The NDL had held a failed rally in Norway in April 2011^.An EDL leader denounced Breivik and the attack on 26 July 2011. He sympathises with the Serbian paramilitarism. He demands the gradual deportation of all Muslims from Europe from 2011 to 2083. He blames feminism for allowing the erosion of the fabric of European society. In his manifesto he also urges the Hindu nationalists to drive Muslims out of India. Despite Breivik's clear dislike for the overall message of Islam, in his manifesto he appeared to approve of the "structural methods" of the Muslim al Qaeda, placing it as one of only two organizations being listed in a section titled "Militant Organizations".

Why, it’s almost like reading a transcript from Faux News! I can almost visualize one of their talking heads blatting on like this on TV. I kid you not. It’s as if the more extreme someone gets, the stupider and more disconnected from reality they become. Of course nobody wants to admit to any responsibility – the ultimate responsibility boils down to the individual, but if the individual is loco de cabasa?

It’s as I always say: the sooner we get rid of religion, the less excuses or hiding places for these ideological thugs.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny Twofer–Sarah Silverman

2011-07-27T06:50:00.001-07:00

Sarah Silverman is always a kick and a giggle.

An ad for the Sidekick 3:

Here’s one of the best ideas I’ve ever heard – sell the Vatican, feed the world:

Ha!

Enjoy.

Banning The Burka–Bye, Bye, Blinders!

2011-07-24T00:15:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

So apparently, the Burka Ban is gaining some ground:

Barcelona to ban Islamic veils in some public spaces

Barcelona has become the first large Spanish city to announce a ban on the wearing of full Islamic face-veils in some public spaces.

The ban was designed to include any head-wear that hindered identification, officials said.

At least two towns in Catalonia, the region that includes Barcelona, have already announced bans.

Belgium and France have both recently taken steps towards restricting the use of full veils in public.

Barcelona's city council said the ban would be largely symbolic, since it was uncommon to see women in the city wearing the full veil.

"Barcelona will forbid the use of the burqa, niqab and any other item which hinders personal identification in any of the city's public installations," a council statement said.

And it’s growing in the rest of Europe:

The Islamic veil across Europe

Countries across Europe have wrestled with the issue of the Muslim veil - in various forms such as the body-covering burka and the niqab, which covers the face apart from the eyes.

The debate takes in religious freedom, female equality, secular traditions and even fears of terrorism.

The veil issue is part of a wider debate about multiculturalism in Europe, as many politicians argue that integration of minorities was neglected in the past.

There is one part of Europe where the opposite is true:

Chechnya women's Islamic dress code: Russia blamed

Russia has been criticised for letting Chechen authorities impose a compulsory Islamic dress code for women.

A report by Human Rights Watch includes testimonies from dozens of Chechen women who were threatened or even attacked with paintballs by young men enforcing the 'virtue campaign'.

The rights group says some attacks involved Chechen security forces.

The campaign has the backing of President Ramzan Kadyrov, relied on by Moscow to stabilise the region.

In 2007, President Kadyrov issued an edict that banned bareheaded women from entering state buildings. Though this is in direct violation of Russian law, it is strictly followed today.

Since then, an unofficial campaign limiting Chechen women's freedoms has been gaining strength, Human Rights Watch says.

A Russian rights activist, Natalya Estemirova, who had publicly criticised the Islamic dress campaign, was abducted from Grozny in July 2009 and her body was later found in the neighbouring republic of Ingushetia.

As an atheist, I detest religious symbology as a rule. It represents a useless anachronism that we as a species should be free from. And likewise, something that covers the natural beauty of woman just because it might tempt some out-of-control loon speaks to me of a rapist culture, where there is no Schrodinger’s rapist, every man is a rapist, the assumption is that the rape will occur, and it will be the woman’s fault for simply being herself in front of others.

And the Middle East? A hotbed of rape culture, where women are routinely savaged, killed, or punished simply because of their sex. And apparently where the men are so insecure, they think every Tom Dick and Harry wants to rape their wives.

Let’s face it: Islam is no more (nor any less) anti-woman than the other two of the big Three Monos. In fact, I won’t even have to trot out the facts of any of those holy texts, because many of our steady readers will be happy to provide the ‘facts’ (such as they are).

In the 70’s in this country, women were burning their bras. Here in the 21st century, it would be nice to see these barbaric customs go right up in flames.

Halloo, Snackbar!

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–The Simpsons

2011-07-20T06:14:00.001-07:00

Nothing quite like the old classics. This one’s the ‘Squishy Bender’.

Enjoy.

The Colonic Catholics Are At It Again–Banning Breast Cancer Donations? Really?

2011-07-17T00:25:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

(Tip o’ the derby to Pharyngula for this one)

I call these people colonic Catholics because – well, they just need the shit cleaned out of their brains. For your weekly dose of outrage:

Bishop of Toledo bars assistance to Komen group

Toledo Catholic Bishop Leonard Blair has banned parishes and parochial schools from raising funds for the Susan G. Komen Foundation, citing concerns that the global anti-cancer giant may someday fund embryonic stem-cell research.

These sorts of idiocies cross my eyes. Seriously? Really? Stem cells? Why is this even a hot topic anymore for anyone with half a brain cell?

Mary Westphal, executive director of the Northwest Ohio Affiliate Susan G. Komen for the Cure, and board chairman Angie Ash said they were "extremely disappointed" in Bishop Blair's decision.

Should’ve just stated that you were pissed.

Bishop Blair, in his letter sent over the weekend to all priests and parishes in the 19-county Toledo diocese, stated that "at present the Komen Foundation does not fund" embryonic stem-cell research.

Which compounds the stupidity, not excuses it.

However, he said, "their policy does not exclude that possibility" and the foundation "may very well fund such research in the future."

With that sort of ‘logic’, he may as well tell everyone not to drive combustion engine cars, because the proceeds may eventually promote Sharia laws in Middle Eastern countries.

And to heighten the stupidity, in the idiot’s own words:

Few of us remain untouched by the scourge of breast cancer. Whether among our families, friends or neighbors, there are a great many women in our country who confront this disease every day with tremendous faith and courage.
Researchers, physicians and medical personnel, using their God-given intelligence and skill, work very hard not only to provide healing of those who are afflicted, but also to find a cure. We are all familiar with the mobilization of effort in our country on behalf of this worthy goal.

Always with the appeals to an imaginary sky daddy.

One of the most widely known initiatives is that of the Susan G. Komen Foundation. Many people participate in efforts to raise funds for this cause, including some of our Catholic institutions and schools.
While we want to do everything possible to support the search for a cure, sadly the landscape of medical research today is sometimes marred by the erroneous belief that research is not bound by moral norms rooted in faith and reason, as reflected in the teaching of the Church. That teaching holds, for example, that it is not morally acceptable to destroy one human life, even in its embryonic stage, in order to save another human life.

This fails on so many levels. A., faith is nothing more than fuzzy feel good crap, and reason triumphs over it in the real world, B., their holy book barely touches on the concept of abortion except that if someone harms a pregnant woman and she miscarries, the person causing the injury has to pay a fine to the husband, and C., a life in the embryonic stage hardly counts, and doesn’t count, via the 14th amendment, until it’s born.

For some time, moral questions have been raised from various quarters about the research funded by the Komen Foundation.

Ha! Catholics talking about morality! That’s a running gag nowadays.

The Bishops of Ohio have discussed this and have looked into the matter.

Christlation: “We muddled through our holy fairy tales, and decided against it. And will defend this with flowery, insubstantial rhetoric.”

As best we can determine, at present the Komen Foundation does not fund cancer research that employs embryonic stem cells. However, their policy does not exclude that possibility. They are open to embryonic stem cell research, and may very well fund such research in the future.

Which is none of your dog-damned business, is what it is.

They are also contributors to Planned Parenthood, which, though it may claim to provide needed medical services to poor women, is also the largest provider of abortions in our country.

Gotta watch these little snakes. ‘May claim’ my homesick ass. But the real problem is what most Catolicks have: the abortion issue. Although PP is one of the largest providers in the US, abortion is only 3% of the services provided. Regardless, it’s obvious that these control freaks in frocks want to tell everyone how to live (which is no surprise).

In order to avoid even the possibility of cooperation in morally unacceptable activities, the other Bishops and I believe that it would be wise to find alternatives to Komen for Catholic fundraising efforts.

The biggest conglomeration of pedophiles since NAMBLA think there’s such a thing as ‘morally unacceptable activities’? What a laugh.

For that reason, I am directing that in the fight against breast cancer, fundraising carried out under Catholic auspices, including our schools, should be channeled to our locally known Mercy Cancer Centers instead of Komen.

At least he’s not directing everyone to ‘pray the cancer away’. Because nothing fails like prayer.

One of the major problems we have, is that we let these assholes dictate to the general public how to act, what to think, and we honor the opinions of some dumb fuck in a frock because they’ve pretty much been in charge for centuries, and nobody in power’s got the gumption to tell these assholes their numbers up, their numbers are down, and their opinion’s for shit.

I really can’t say this often enough: fuck religion. It teaches discrimination, it teaches crazy horseshit, and it lets the nutjobs squeak by under the radar way too frequently.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny–The Naked Gun 33 1/3

2011-07-12T21:22:00.001-07:00

Yes, I know the Naked Guns are campy, kitschy slapstick. Still love ‘em though.

Naked Gun 33 1/3–best moments.

Enjoy.

The Republican Party: How Do I Loathe Thee? Let Me Count The Ways…

2011-07-09T22:12:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Normally, in terms of ideology, I struggle to adopt a similar credo along the lines of “hate the idea, love the ideologue” (yeah, yeah, it smacks of “hate the sin, love the sinner”: so what, get over it) – and the Republican Party has been a particular target, for good reason.

And I can claim the dubious honor of being able to discover if there are any Republicans in earshot, without pointedly asking “Are you a Republican?” Simply announce “The Republican Party should be abolished!” or “That party has f___-ed up this country beyond belief” or something similar, and anyone simple enough to belong to that pusillanimous party of poltroons will pipe up with one of two statements:

“You can’t say that!” (have ‘em call the cops then), or
“Hey, the Democrats aren’t much better!”

The chances are better with response number 2, because it’s a common favorite of theirs, a tactic known as a red herring, something we’ve all seen them do at the drop of a hat.

Anyways, we have two headings here: the first is the number of personages that have taught us to loathe this party, and the second is the number of mind-numbing contradictions/hypocrisies they seem to swim in obliviously.

Talking Heads for the GOP Why they suck

Michelle Bachmann

Where to start? The roots of her constituency are laden in right-wing fuckagelicals - she speaks in code to them, for cripes sake, and when she’s NOT speaking in code to these idiots, she gibbers like a fucking monkey (only a monkey would make more sense, because there would be some effort involved.).

Rush Limbaugh

I tend to call this guy “Rush Himbo”, because he’ll spread his legs for just about any rethuglickin’ politician around. The same guy who stated that “all addicts should be locked up, and throw away the key” happened to have a monkey on his back too, which changed his tune. Oh, and wishing that Obama would fail – nice, patriotic statement, that. He’d have excoriated anyone who said that about Dubya: believe it. And criticizing Michelle about her weight and belts? Are you joking? No, just an idiot who makes too much money.

George W.

This assclown deserves an entire post dedicated to his rampant idiocies, from stem cell research to sticking up for creationists to…I get exhausted just thinking about how this guy raped our country. This spaz was a worse president than Woodrow Wilson could’ve aspired to…and that’s pretty bad. I’m surprised my ears don’t bleed when he’s mentioned.

Glen Beck.

That this schlub makes 32 million a year sets my teeth on edge. This yobbo is the definitive fast-food of politics – the idiot ideologue who panders to the attention-deficit masses. It’s not bad enough he’s a Mormon, his ‘influences’ are a grab-bag of the worst possible fringe theories on record. I’ve met homeless derelicts in the streets who gibber less (and make more sense) than this guy.

Ann Coulter

This woman is definitely yin to Beck’s yang. Every time I hear something from or about her, my eyes bulge and my jaw hits the floor. This is someone who whines about being misquoted as mischaracterization, and yet says some of the most spiteful, twisted, stupid and anti-Semitic commentary ever heard.

Chris Buttars

I banged on Butterball back in the day at GifS – he’s a homophobe and an ID idiot.

Tom Delay

This guy is a perfect example of ‘do as I say, not as I do’ – he’s done it all (well, almost), from money laundering to accepting bribes to despotism to stupid statements about evolution. In fact, he’d done everything wrong a republican can do except have an affair with another man.

Newt Gingrich

I like to call this guy “Newt Gangrene” – sure it’s middle school to do so, but like all the others I’ve listed, he’s simply a rotten excuse for…anything, really. He spear-headed the government shutdown in the mid-90’s, he’s a philandering Catholic (yeah, no contradiction there), and the idiocies that pour out of his mouth are an inadequate substitute for reality.

Sarah Palin

What list of Reich-wing jackasses would be complete without the Palin-into-insignificance? I’ve said it before – most guys degenerate into slobbering idiocy at the sight of eye candy, and pay no heed to the nonsense that comes sliding out of their mouths. She endorses the Tea-baggers (like the rest of these monkeys), her stances on health care, social issues, and the environment are beyond risible, and (IMO) would be better off taking knitting as opposed to politics, because she ain’t shit at the latter.

Ronald Regan.

Sure, he’s not about to defend himself anymore, but this grandfatherly old fuck wrecked this country, and set the standards of silliness for all the people I’ve thus far mentioned. His religious craziness was an infectious meme that’s polluted the waters far too long. Harlan Ellison once stated that Regan would’ve been a better president if he A. put a firecracker between his teeth, B. lit it, and C. stuck his head up his ass.

Rupert Murdoch.

Here’s another fuck who made all of today’s crazies mainstream. Fox News. Need I say more? This mook has turned the political landscape of America into another (metaphorical) Chernobyl disaster.

There are, no doubt, a number of names you’d like to add to this list – but brevity forbids it.

No doubt some pandering accomodationist will mewl about how the Democrats aren’t any better (what about other parties? What other parties?), but the hypocrisy runs high with the conservatives. Remember – this is the truly religious party (and yet most prominent of them can’t seem to stay married to one woman, and the others chase young MALE pages or hit on strangers in bathrooms) that believes in the ‘sanctity of marriage’, the party that believes in ‘limited government’ (which obviously doesn’t apply to bedroom practices or women’s rights)…the hypocrisy is staggering. What’s even more so, is that their ‘enlightened’ constituency never seems to catch onto to these raging out-of-control bozos. And why? Because religion (Christianity in particular) encourages the sheeple to turn a blind eye to these rampant examples of moral turpitude.

So on one hand we have the representatives of this particular mindset, and it falls inches from resembling true bedlam. On the other hand, we have a long list of woes they wish to afflict on us via legislation – and with that long a list of religious folk, you can bet every possible theory of how they can inflict their ideological idiocy on us will not only be voiced, but everything short of the more horrific will be actually considered.

Masticate on that, and get back to me.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny - Futurama

2011-07-06T08:10:00.001-07:00

I was recently at a musical gig in East Palo Alto that was being held at the House Of Bigger Girls (seriously!) - it wasn’t what the title infers, but the title of the place put this episode of Futurama (Amazon Women In The Mood) in my mind:

Is she hot?

Enjoy.

How Creationists Are Wrecking Our Culture–And It Shows, Even In The Prettier Faces…

2011-07-02T22:09:00.001-07:00

“Take the only tree that's left and stuff it up the hole in your culture” – Leonard Cohen, The Future

"Be uncomfortable; be sand, not oil, to the machinery of the world." — Gunter Eich.

Watching this video should probably get your teeth gnashing, mostly because it’s chock full of the regular idiocies that the creationists spread among us, like when foreign settlers handed out smallpox-ridden blankets to the Native Americans (if you’ll pardon the metaphor).

For the most part, the beauty queens in this video are playing the diplomacy card, and give equal weight to the crazies. Among the inanities:

A. This is a NON-DEBATE. An empty question. Evolution is taught in schools regardless. In fact, biology classes would not exist without it.
B. The ‘Fair Play’ Debate is. Just. Plain. Stupid. Science has never been about democracy. It isn’t. Reality isn’t decided by popular vote. “We should teach the kids every idea, and let them decide.” Really? Have any of these women had kids? Taught them? Does everybody just grow a blank spot about how effin’ confused they were as children, let alone teenagers? Newsflash: there aren’t any kids around who are as sharp as the ones in those coming-of-age movies. Sorry.
C. This one always sets my teeth on edge: Evolution is just a theory. Let’s just toss out gravity and relativity too, while we’re at it.

I realize this is a re-occurring motif for me, so sorry if I harp on this, but (I feel) it can’t be emphasized enough: an opinion is just a statement, unless it has evidence to back it up. Then it becomes a statement of fact (or facts). What is mind-boggling, is that the improper use of language can spin anything into “it’s just your opinion.”

But in America, we mince. We tip-toe on eggshells. We cave based on the precepts of diplomacy. That feelings are such fragile things, they need to be nurtured, and if those feelings are religious? Roll out the red fucking carpet and throw a freakin’ ticker-tape parade, and shout it from the rooftops.

What utter milquetoast horse manure.

Or to quote Howard Beale from the movie Network: "I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore." So I’ve undertaken my own personal mission: every time someone starts out with “Well, I believe [insert bizarre fringe nonsense here]…”, I interrupt them with “It doesn’t matter what you believe.” Go ahead and try it sometime. Likelihood is, you’ll get some serious glaring, maybe even the occasional maniacal glint. People will be offended (I gave up worrying about that decades ago: the years have taught me, that somebody somewhere will be stoked no matter what), their feelings will be hurt. You may even get some accommodationist who’s been suckered in by the ‘every opinion is valid’ nonsense jumping right in and telling you ‘you can’t say that!’ (I tell those folks to have me arrested then. What? You can’t? Then I guess I CAN say it.)

One of the other problems that leads into this, is what I like to call ‘Pretty Face Syndrome’. If it’s on TV (or in a movie), and it’s emoted by someone attractive, it gets accepted almost automatically. Because really, who would listen to an utter moron mouth complete stupidity unless it’s packaged properly? There really isn’t any other reason people listen to idiots like Sarah Palin, Ann Coulter, or Jenna McCarthy unless the presentation gives most men erections. And yeah, it’s still a man’s world, so this crap floats in under the radar because most guys (myself excluded) tend to listen with half an ear while slobbering over cleavage. Conversely, I’m willing to bet there’s a lot more female Scientologists because Travolta and Cruise are floating around on the Good Ship Lollipop spreading their little meme disease.

So here it is, July Fourth, Happy Birthday America! And what better way to celebrate your First Amendment rights than by spreading dissent and practicing your freedom FROM religion.

Because there is no freedom of religion, unless there’s freedom from religion.

Have a safe and happy Fourth, and give ‘em reason for me!

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny–Margaret Cho

2011-06-28T22:02:00.001-07:00

Margaret Cho skewers Christianity:

Enjoy.

Because Discrimination Should Matter To Everyone…

2011-06-26T08:55:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Well, the good news is in: New York’s now the sixth state to ratify same-sex marriage. Among other pleasant surprises:

“New York's Republican-controlled legislature cleared the way Friday to legalize same-sex marriage with a 33-to-29 vote, sending the bill to the governor's desk for his approval.”

A question that does spring up from time to time, is why do atheists weigh in on this topic? More often than not, it’s that generalized ‘hey, you’re not gay, why do you care?’

There’s plenty of reasons to care. For one, there’s the issue of sympatico – if you’ve ever been discriminated against, it’s an ugly feeling; and if you’re any kind of human at all, you shouldn’t wish that sort of nonsense on anyone else. For another, the anti-gay arguments against this sort of union is primarily religious. By forcing a religious belief on others, it’s a clear violation of the Separation of Church and State. And even more fundamental rights than constitutional ones. It is safe to say, there aren’t any secular arguments against it.

It’s even safer to say, that Christianity has carried the homophobic torch for some centuries now. It’s an old, rotted tradition that should be scrapped, along with the institution that implemented it.

Of course all the homophobes are up in arms about this (even the ‘polite ones’) – including one who has a lesbian granddaughter. I can’t abide the Westboro Bozos, but at least everyone knows where they stand on this, and they aren’t talking out of both sides of their collective mouths. The ‘I have friends/family who are gay’ excuse doesn’t bail people out.

If you tell one subset of people that they aren’t allowed to do something that everyone else can, that’s discrimination.

That’s a fact, not an ‘opinion’.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Sterling Archer Twofer

2011-06-22T08:55:00.001-07:00

I enjoy animation (perhaps too much), and Sterling Archer is roaringly funny.

Online pregnancy test:

HR complaint from outta left field:

Enjoy.

Just The Vax, Ma’am–Delusional Denialism Has Many Faces…

2011-06-18T23:17:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Vaccine Gestapo
They have swastikas on their shoulders
They’re such patriotic soldiers
They’re like a militia in Montana
They’re a government agency in Atlanta

Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!
Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!

They’re a medical military priesthood
Just like Adolf they preach the greater good
Conscientious objectors are just little snots
Why don’t you quit complaining and go get your shots

Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!
Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!

(An actual Anti-vaccination rally song!)

I’m a raging curmudgeon. I admit it freely. To paraphrase Hamlet, I take arms against a sea of stupidities, and thus my voice is sometimes drown’d by them.

So just recently, I was once more into the breach, dear friends, here:

A fellow local in the Mountain View area published this rather vacuous article titled To Vaccinate or not to Vaccinate. I have nothing against this fellow personally: his opinion, however, is another matter entirely. This specious opening paragraph is too much:

For some time now, there has been debate about the effectiveness and adverse reactions of vaccines.

In factuality, people have been ranting and raving about vaccinations since the 17th century. And here we are, 4 centuries later, and we still have crazy conspiracy theories that are built up around innocuous items like needles. I dislike them as much as the next person, but hey, it’s either blood or poop. I’ll take the needle, thanks, since I only allow a select form of paper near that orifice, if there’s any choice at all.

But then this paragraph:

Groups such as Doctors Against Vaccines have researched and put together an amazing amount of information and made it available to all of us internet users. I reiterate, us internet users, because although some alternative sources of radio and television exist where these facts are told to the people, mainstream media focuses on the other version, where vaccines are seen as safe, reliable and necessary.

Well, sorry, it reeks of accommodationism. What’s one of my favorite sayings, folks? Oh yeah: “The internet is like the bible: it’s 99% full of shit.” Funnier still, this egregious nonsense started (in this century, anyhow) with the now-debunked Andy Wakefield and his Flimsy Fraudulent Findings. Not to mention non-degreed Jenna McCarthy, whose idiotic stance on the entire ‘debate’ is only taken seriously because she’s good-looking and telegenic. And far, far too many people take Oprah seriously. (This same guy tries to use Youtube videos to back his claim: I re-iterate – Youtube is the National Enquirer of the Interwebs, and I don’t accept it as a viable or informed source.)

I hate doing this shit, because it smacks of an ad hominem, but when I actually go to the website Doctors Against Vaccines, it’s run by a bunch of…homeopaths. Yes, that’s right. They’re not real doctors, any more than chiropractors, aromeopaths, or any of those other New Age quacksters. A simple, objective evaluation of all their wiki pages bears this out. Five minutes on the internet, and the house of cards collapses.

The fact of the matter is, folks, that this is a non-debate on multiple levels. I kept running into these wackjobs on the web who were declaring a world-wide alert that the medical community (and big pharma) are poisoning our kids.

Do these people even listen to themselves? Since when has putting children at risk ever been a good business model? As I noted in the comments, big pharma doesn’t need to keep people sick or make them sick – human beings are a constant litany of ills and woes, and being a doctor is very nearly recession-proof because of that. It’s like saying restaurants are starving people, or dentists are handing out candy to the neighborhood to promote tooth decay. Are there some folks in the medical field who are in it for the money? Of course. But this ‘us vs. them’ mentality is mostly ignorant fear.

It’s a huge problem: first, it’s television, folks. Talk shows are just that: all talk. Secondly, I’ve developed a pretty keen skeptic’s edge (I’d like to think). I don’t run off to someone else’s website to vindicate myself. Anyone anywhere can go on the web these days, and find some nutcase who validates whatever crazy-ass idea the researcher had in the first place. I go straight to a Wiki/Answers.com page, do some preliminary evaluations. If someone purposely goes looking for villainous undercurrents, confirmation bias will validate their paranoia about invidious evil forces out to destroy them/their life/their freedom/[insert paranoid fear here]. In short: detachment is essential in evaluation.

Thirdly, something even more dangerous, is this ‘everyone’s opinion is valid’ crapola. No, it isn’t. Opinion doesn’t trump fact, nor does perception alter reality. Evolution? Reality. Vaccinations? Established science. Anything that’s unprovable, no matter how pretty or poetic (or fear-mongering), is rubbish. I blame political correctness (read: polite fascism) for this. That someone has a dissenting opinion is fine. Free speech and all that. America was built on dissent anyways. But having an opinion is distinct from being able to prove it. Most folks think their opinion is indistinguishable from their character, especially when they have some vested interest or feel passionately about it.

My big issues are these:

A. This is what I categorize as a NON-DEBATE – track records speak louder than dissent in this case. Is it seamless? No. Nothing is. (i.e., One of my pet peeves, is when I talk about GPS, some brainfart blats out that “GPS isn’t 100%”. Name me ten things that are 100%, please. I’ve gotten horribly lost relying on the directions from strangers more often than from my GPS. Sorry. Onwards.) Some people have adverse reactions to flu shots? Of course they do. Just like some people don’t survive life-saving surgery. A little sense, please.

B. Some non-debates like these cost money. In this case, they cost lives. Children’s lives, no less. So yes, it’s a pisser.

About the only sense I can make of this idiocy, is that the Powers That Be (all human, I might qualify) are creating all sorts of diversionary nonsense to take the heat off of their incompetency.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Futurama

2011-06-15T10:52:00.001-07:00

This one’s exceptionally funny – the eyePhone:

Enjoy.

Ugandan Homophobia And The Conclussion*…

2011-06-11T22:33:00.001-07:00

Cross-posted @ the Atheist Oasis

The insanity seems to spread like wildfire in Uganda:

South Africa gay rights activists warn of homophobic attacks after murder

Anger follows alleged gang rape and murder of lesbian campaigner International footballer Eudy Simelane was apparently sexually assaulted and tortured before being killed three years ago. Human rights campaigners have warned of an "epidemic" of brutal homophobic attacks in South Africa after the murder and alleged gang rape of a lesbian activist. Noxolo Nogwaza was killed last month after what appeared to be a so-called "corrective rape", an increasingly common crime in which men rape lesbians to "turn" them straight or "cure" them of their sexual orientation....

Is it something in the water? Raping someone so that they ‘turn’? So, if a bunch of guys takes turns anally violating another man, he’ll become gay? The sickening stupidity of this is frightening. I’d be willing to bet the rent that this xenophobic garbage wasn’t nearly so prevalent prior to the missionaries spewing their cautionary fables over the cultural landscape and enforcing them at gunpoint.

The vacuous homily that all a lesbian woman needs is a good penis to change her sexual orientation is ludicrous at the very least, and incredibly sexist and self-absorbed (read: sexual sociopath) at the worst. It speaks of a middle-school mentality that’s barely forgivable in children, and an offense to all of civilization in an adult.

Rape is, in my book, one of the highest crimes one individual can commit on another, rating right up there with pedophilia and murder. The violation of another’s sexual autonomy is a savage scar across the psyche that wreaks havoc on us all in the long term, and dark night terrors on the victim, likely for life. It is terrorism, short and simple.

And it should not be allowed. Ever. Period. The end. And the peddlers of this trash should be prosecuted to the highest extent of any law anywhere.

The hidden shame of the source of this evil is (no surprise here) Christianity, followed quite closely by the other two monotheisms (Judaism got this entire sick ball rolling in the first place). Women are subjugated in all their tales, and the consistent lie that homosexuality is unnatural (the observance of nature quite belies that claim). I do not blame religion itself: religion is a construct by which obsessive crazy people give themselves a free pass to indulge their sociopathic tendencies.

So let’s play the blame game: I personally blame these fucktards:

Americans’ Role Seen in Uganda Anti-Gay Push

KAMPALA, Uganda — Last March, three American evangelical Christians, whose teachings about “curing” homosexuals have been widely discredited in the United States, arrived here in Uganda’s capital to give a series of talks.

The theme of the event, according to Stephen Langa, its Ugandan organizer, was “the gay agenda — that whole hidden and dark agenda” — and the threat homosexuals posed to Bible-based values and the traditional African family.

For three days, according to participants and audio recordings, thousands of Ugandans, including police officers, teachers and national politicians, listened raptly to the Americans, who were presented as experts on homosexuality. The visitors discussed how to make gay people straight, how gay men often sodomized teenage boys and how “the gay movement is an evil institution” whose goal is “to defeat the marriage-based society and replace it with a culture of sexual promiscuity.”

Now the three Americans are finding themselves on the defensive, saying they had no intention of helping stoke the kind of anger that could lead to what came next: a bill to impose a death sentence for homosexual behavior.

So you wander into a cesspit of ignorance and stupidity, fan the flames, ignite the villagers and hand them pitchforks, and then you assholes feign surprise there was violence? I’ll bet there are crackheads on the streets who have more sense. Or brains. And really, what qualified these asswipes anyways? I’ve tended to notice, that if you just slap on a title under the guise of religion, somehow that lends it more credence than it should.

Had I a say, we’d lock these fucks up and throw away the key. I can almost forgive the Ugandans (almost, but not quite) for being undereducated morons discriminating against their fellow human beings, but these fuckagelicals were sent to decent (one supposes) schools, raised in a country where the living standards are astronomically different than Uganda’s, and here they go stirring the pot and fanning the flames of raging sexual xenophobia.

It makes me physically ill sometimes, it does.

Till the next post, then.

^{*(A conclussion is a portmanteau I learned on Pharyngula: it is a combo of conclusion and concussion. So if the conclusion gives someone a concussion, that’s a conclussion.)}

Tuesday Twofer–The Ricky Gervais Show

2011-06-07T08:46:00.001-07:00

I’ve always enjoyed Ricky’s humor. Here’s an unusual show format: the original was done as podcast, and when they brought it to TV (or DVD), they set it up as animation.

The first clip is about armed dolphins, which is what I like to call a leaker (it made me leak tears, it did):

This second clip is a hysterical look at the afterlife according to Karl Pilkington.

Blind ghosts? (Snort!)

Enjoy.

“…And Justice For All…”–How Religion Rapes The Concept…

2011-06-05T03:14:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Halls of Justice Painted Green
Money Talking
Power Wolves Beset Your Door
Hear Them Stalking
Soon You'll Please Their Appetite
They Devour
Hammer of Justice Crushes You
Overpower - Metallica, "And Justice For All"

His rights in violation
Through sharp intimidation
He's soon to realize
That their words are full of lies - Anacrusis, “Injustice”

One of the things that gets me all lathered up, is how the religious live in this comic book world, where someone, sometime, will swoop in (at some unspecified time/date) and rectify an inequitable situation.

Case in point: I was visiting my Dominionist/YEC buddy (hey, I know, I know: but I love the guy like a brother, the friendship’s over 30 years old, and…excuses, excuses. We just don’t debate ideology any more, I yell too much) a while back, and unprompted, he starts in with this nonsense about “I can’t wait till Jesus shows up, and life is wonderful and lovey-dovey, and justice will be done.” (Para) I let him finish, and told him point blank, that that just wasn’t going to happen, like, not EVER. While the more disconnected of the delusionists will assure me that somehow this is an isolated example, I can safely bet the rent that not only is that incorrect, it’s the state of mental affairs for the bulk of the religulous.

In fact, back in the days of my cafeteria Christianity, I had some nebulous notion that everyone who’d ever wronged me would get their ‘just desserts’. Stronger likelihood is that they just ate pie, and forgot about what they did.

Let’s define justice somewhat on a loose level, and go from there:

Justice is the concept of moral rightness based on ethics, rationality, law, natural law, religion, fairness, or equity, along with the punishment of the breach of said ethics.

Now the point of this post is not to debate the overall concepts of jurisprudence, or to weigh respective acts on some abstract scale. No, it is to point out that this concept of justice as Divine Command is not only utter horseshit, but that it poisons the meme ecology, and leads to a situation that boils down to ‘for the want of a nail…’

This will require some thought. How often have you heard the vacuous homily, “Gawd has a plan for you?” Too many? Me too. I don’t have enough fingers and toes to count the times I’ve (over)heard this crap. Taking it a step further: how many of your friends/family members, casual acquaintances (et al) who have stated (verbatim or para) that “so-and-so will get his/hers/theirs”? Sit down and hash that out. It probably rates up there with any other startling statistics you’ve glossed over for who knows how many years you’ve been alive. I will say on my part: a LOT. If you hang with Buddhists, it’s called karma. And holy shit, there’s even a TV show that predicates its premises on this nonsense. Being a primarily Christian majority in America, however, means that a lot more folks will err on the side of ‘Jebus’ll take care o’ me.”

I will state this: the only people that the concept of karma works on, are the people who aren’t sociopaths. We are the creatures who are self aware, and feel empathy. Those of us who have committed some act of injustice on another will have that nagging thing called a conscience somewhere in the corners of our minds, and the guilt will make us self-sabotage either in the short- or long-term. The crazy assholes who think they’re the center and reality of the universe? Not so much. Lacking a degree, that’s all I’ll say on that for the moment.

So how does this impact the culture from a victim’s viewpoint? Instead of stepping up and addressing any injustice or injury committed on a person’s character, livelihood, relationships, etc., it allows the victimizer to get away with said transgression, and encourages the injured to keep silent. It empowers the passive to stay passive, and allows the transgressor a degree of freedom they shouldn’t have.

And it prompts idiocies like the Urethra Dilemma. I mean really: how many thousands of man-hours have been devoted to garbage like that? Hours better spent feeding hungry children, building shelters, or just objectively measuring the scale of the universe? But I digress…

And there’s so very many examples of how divinity has never stepped in. The Holocaust. The Darfur genocide. Cambodia and East Timor. Bosnia. There’s a laundry list of these examples that turns my stomach just thinking of them. Where exactly was karma then? Or Jebus? Nowhere to be found.

I realize I’m skirting the fringes of a slippery slope argument, but it’s more along the lines of the Boiling Frog. My point is that it is an incremental allowance: we allow an individual some slack in regards to acts of selfishness. The individual sees that s/he can get away with this, and begins to test the boundaries. Before you object, recall that Dahmer started with small animals, and it was never addressed (being as he was raised in a fuckagelical environment, it kind of makes my point for me) or dealt with.

And people are lazy. They just are. Humans rationalize, because either they’re disempowered (by word or deed) to speak up on their own behalf, or they’re taught some gratuitous crap about ‘just desserts’, i.e, the universe/gawd/allah/karma [insert deity or concept of choice] will step in and rectify a situation regardless of how tolerable (or intolerable) said situation has escalated.

The nutshell of all this is: there’s no justice. There’s just us. And as the universe cares not a bit for us, more’s the reason we need to take care of one another.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Rowan Atkinson

2011-06-01T10:15:00.001-07:00

Rowan Atkinson is a comedic genius: he should be listed in the top 100 funniest people ever, easily. I’ve always enjoyed his capering wit.

In this clip, he takes the standard Sunday Sermon, and makes it hilarious:

Enjoy.

Allegories Gone Wild–Holy Mary, Mother Of Who…?

2011-05-29T00:01:00.001-07:00

Cross-posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Ah so long Marianne
It’s time that we began
To laugh and cry and cry
And laugh about it all again – Leonard Cohen, “So Long Marianne”

“Read the Bible again sometime. Women are painted as bigger antagonists than the Egyptians and Romans combined. It stinks.” Serendipity, the movie ‘Dogma’

One of the more familiar tirades against that compendium of cautionary fables is the correct accusation of misogyny. And let’s face it: it’s true. From Eve to Jezebel to Mary Magdalene, women have been maligned, mistreated, and bartered off like chattel. There’s old Abraham, pimping his wife (not once, but twice!) under the disguise of siblinghood. Eve ate the fruit (apple, whatthefuckever) and doomed all of us. Samson met his demise because of Delilah (although from all accounts, Mr. Jawbone was a multiple jackass anyways). Women weren’t taken as disciples during the alleged Palestinian Ministry but were second-raters, right behind the 75 righteous guys (messiah groupies?). And the man-child myth constantly dressed down his mother through 3 of the 4 books.

Becoming a vessel for the divine, however symbolic it may be, is considered something of an honor. Pre-Christian fertility rites were ubiquitous until the holy-rollers rolled in and started banging bibles over the pagans’ heads. Males have always feared and been mystified by a woman’s ability to conceive. A shift from the matriarchal to the patriarchal intensified this irrational fear, even fostered it. But there is no denying the power of a woman – it is a reality, and one that even the most fortitudinous delusionist cannot explain away. And so begin the stories…

I speak of that strange illusion of the Marianne Apparition.

This woman is seen everywhere. On grilled cheese sandwiches, for one. Tree stumps for another. There’s no doubt a laundry list, but we’ll skip over those. They’re everywhere anyways.

Anyways, the definition (from the link above) says:

A Marian apparition is an event in which the Blessed Virgin Mary is believed to have supernaturally appeared to one or more people.They are often given names based on the town in which they were reported, or on the sobriquet which was given to Mary on the occasion of the apparition. They have been interpreted in religious terms as theophanies.

Marian apparitions sometimes are reported to recur at the same site over an extended period of time. In the majority of Marian apparitions only a few people report having witnessed the apparition. Exception to this include Zeitoun, and Assiut where thousands claimed to have seen her over a period of time.

And as well to be expected, the reports vary so widely in so many ways, it’s obvious that they can’t be taken seriously. I’ve gone on at length on one such topic, but centuries of ‘eyewitnesses’ would seem to testify that…these people saw something, albeit the likelihood is that they saw what they wanted to see.

For the most part, careful examination of these events opens subsequent cracks in the stories, some with holes in them large enough to drive a semi through. In fact, there is so much wrong with eyewitness identification, that there are actually rigorous standards used to assess the reliability of a witness. Note that when religion is involved, these standards vanish like light clouds on a windy day.

We’ll go ahead and skip to the criticisms for the sake of brevity:

Some Protestant Christians and non-Christians regard claims of Marian apparitions as being hallucinations encouraged by superstition, and occasionally simply as deliberate hoaxes to attract attention. Many such apparitions are reported in economically depressed areas, attracting many pilgrims who bring trade and money into the region. For instance, some sources dispute the very existence of Saint Juan Diego.

Yes, it’s mostly Papists who indulge in this sort of tomfoolery. Small wonder there.

Some spontaneous healings reported at apparition sites such as Lourdes are also disputed by some scientists^[who?]. Other scientists^[who?] have claimed that a handful of unexplained cures have occurred; the Lourdes Medical Bureau has recorded sixty "inexplicable" healings which match its requirements.

I don’t know about anyone else, but this is the first Wiki entry I’ve ever seen where the footnotes says ^[who?].

Critics maintain that some other healings are incomplete, leaving the sufferer with disabilities or chronic illness, and that other claimed healings are likely to be the relatively rare but unmiraculous spontaneous remission of illness or injury. Such remissions might be expected to occur in a few of the large numbers of ill (and perhaps credulous) people who visit such sites. That viewpoint is debated by religious people and by some in the medical profession. The Lourdes Medical Bureau will not review cases of claimed healing involving illnesses known sometimes to go into remission by themselves, or incomplete healings, or those which take place gradually.^[106]

It always boils down to this one sentence: It’s all guesswork. Nobody subjects any of these ‘miracles’ to anything resembling the scientific method, the ‘testimonials’ turn out to be a smorgasbord of ridiculous anecdotes that nobody in their right mind would take seriously, and the only people doing any exhaustive research on these hallucinations are the Catholics (can you say ‘conflict of interest’, boys and girls?).

So there you have it: if you see a woman in your grilled cheese sandwich, everyone will laugh at you. Unless you claim there’s divine iconography involved, in which case you can sell the fucking on EBay for thousands of dollars. Nice return: it costs what? About a buck-fifty to make the sandwich?

It’s a sad, stupid world we live in sometimes.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny–Six Feet Under…The ‘Rapture’

2011-05-24T08:58:00.001-07:00

Given the recent silliness that transpired on May 21st (the Rapture that never was), this video clip is hysterically relevant:

What’s even more interesting, is that this actually was reported as real news, but was quite bogus. (No surprise there, eh?)

Enjoy.

For All The Donner Und Blitzen – Only A Light Drizzle

2011-05-21T22:41:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine. - REM, "It's The End Of The World"

When you've fallen on the highway
and you're lying in the rain,
and they ask you how you're doing
of course you'll say you can't complain --
If you're squeezed for information,
that's when you've got to play it dumb:
You just say you're out there waiting
for the miracle, for the miracle to come. – Leonard Cohen, “Waiting For The Miracle”

As no doubt the bulk of our readership is aware, the alleged Second Coming has come and gone – a foofaraw of ‘biblical proportions’. The heavens did not split open, no reverberant shook the world’s pillars, and millions of people did NOT suddenly fly up into the heavens. No, not even the alleged 144,000.

For my own part, a short heavyset black woman was canvassing our apartment complex as I went to retrieve the mail this afternoon. We greeted each other, and she asked if she could speak to me. I said sure. She immediately started in with trying to hand me materials (in this case, it was some dogma on a printed blue page in a plastic sleeve), and when I saw that it was religious in nature, I wouldn’t take it and I informed her that I was an atheist. I was wearing my “Atheism: Thinking for ourselves since the evolution of the brain” T-shirt. I informed her she wouldn’t get very far. Nor did she. She immediately tried a sloppy version of the Paly’s Watchmaker crap, asking me “Who put the breath into you? Who put the stars in the sky?” etc. My response was: “Nobody. Religion is just humanity’s effort to cast its own shadow onto the universe.” Failing there, she started blabbing about the bible. Oops, bad move: I know my shit. I told her absolutely NONE of the ‘prophecies’ ever came true; the bible is like the internet, 99% full of shit. She tried to whip out that old “In Isaiah, there was a prediction..” To which I pointed out that the verse is out of context, it was entirely topical, and that that is known as contextomy. She blithered on about sinning, I told her that was a lame effort to explain mistakes. We went round and round in that vein – I kept my cool, and she proved to be quite polite as well as unflappable. We parted ways amicably enough (I was pretty much laughing out loud through most of her ‘fishing’ expedition), and she went on to bother other folks, including the elderly lady upstairs (with whom I wagered a neat 1,000 USD that nothing would happen today), that went on for some hours.

I’ve been (lackadaisically) monitoring various news sites, and wouldntcha know it, there’s not been a single report of people being spirited en masse into the sky. Surprised? No, not really.

In fact, the oncoming ‘Second Coming’ as been something of a long-running joke, both in realtime as well as the blogosphere. My musician buddies from Mojo Hannah were cracking wise about it last night (mentioning the Pre-Rapture Agreement, etc.)

Sadly, it is not all humor and fun. As I mentioned in March, a mother went wankola and tried to harm herself and her two kids. And now some teenagers have no money to go to college because of Camping the Con Man. News from New Zealand is as expected: nobody’s rocking the boat down there either. And as an extra treat: the senile old vulture predicted this back in 1994.

So there you have it. Nothing happened – AGAIN. And again, without a doubt, there will be the more hidebound of these crazies proclaiming their faith and insisting it will still happen. Which it won’t.

[On a side note, given what I now know about the ‘bible’ – I say we dispense of the term ‘of Biblical proportions’ because….well, again, nothing happened the way it says it did. If anything happened at all.]

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny–Firesign Theater

2011-05-18T10:20:00.001-07:00

While I remember being terribly stoned while listening to these folks (this being decades ago), Firesign Theater is still funny after all these years. This bit is about UFO’s invading:

Enjoy.

Uganda’s Anti-Gay Legislation ‘Shelved’–Sometimes There Is Good News, Sometimes Not…

2011-05-15T00:08:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

I’ve railed at length multiple times about Uganda, and its execrable taste in right-wing ‘mores’ – this is at least somewhat cheerful news:

Uganda anti-gay bill 'shelved by parliament'

Uganda's parliament has adjourned without debating a controversial bill which includes the death penalty for some homosexual acts.

It had been reported that a vote could be held on Friday.

The Anti-Homosexuality Bill has been condemned by Western leaders and human rights groups, some of whom are celebrating "victory".

The bill, first introduced in 2009, could still be brought up when the new parliament meets later this year.

Uganda is a largely conservative society and many people condemn homosexuality both as un-African and un-Christian.

But in recent years, some gay rights groups have been set up in the country.

Homosexual acts are already illegal in Uganda but the bill would increase the penalty for those convicted to life in prison.

Those found guilty of of "aggravated homosexuality" - defined as when one of the participants is a minor, HIV-positive, disabled or a "serial offender" - would face the death penalty.

Anyone failing to report to the authorities a person they knew to be homosexual would also be liable to prosecution.

International pressure

Internet campaign group Avaaz said the bill's lack of progress was a "victory for all Ugandans and people across the world who value human rights".

"We must now ensure this heinous bill can never return to parliament again," said Avaaz campaign director Alice Jay.

Gay rights campaigner David Kato was killed in January

Maria Burnett of Human Rights Watch said it would still be a very long fight to stop the Ugandan legislation as "the issue has not gone away".

"The international pressure over the last year and a half has been very important to show that Uganda cannot act in isolation from the international community," she said.

US President Barack Obama has condemned the bill and donors have urged Uganda's government to ensure the measures never become law.

But David Bahati, the MP who introduced the private member's bill, said he would try to re-introduce it when the next parliament convened after February's elections, and said it had achieved his goal of sparking debate.

"We have made important steps in raising the issue and that will continue," he was quoted as saying by the AFP news agency.

In January, David Kato, a campaigner who led condemnation of the bill, was murdered not long after suing a paper that outed him as gay. Police denied the killing was because of his sexuality.

Three months before the murder, Uganda's Rolling Stone newspaper had published the photographs of several people it said were gay, with the headline "Hang them."

It’s quite frightening, really. That anyone would even countenance such nonsense in the 21st century is almost unbelievable (qualifying word is ‘unbelievable’ – I do so wish it were). So who was it exactly who brought this utter bullshit with them? Yep, you guessed it in one: American evangelicals:

Uganda is a country where American-style evangelical Christianity is exploding, and there are close links between many American anti-gay preachers, politicians, and activists, and their Ugandan counterparts. As Jeff Sharlet has reported, Bahati, the Anti-Homosexuality Bill’s sponsor, is the secretary of the Ugandan branch of The Family, the secretive American evangelical organization whose members include Sens. James Inhofe, Jim DeMint, and Tom Coburn. Martin Ssempa, a Pentecostal preacher who has championed the bill, was a protégé of Rick Warren and, during the Bush administration, a recipient of at least $90,000 of American aid earmarked for abstinence promotion. Another major anti-gay activist, Stephen Langa, the head of Uganda’s Family Life Network, is an affiliate of the Phoenix-based group Disciple Nations Alliance.

Wait – ‘abstinence 'promotion’? Doesn’t that have an 80% plus failure rate? As for Disciple Nations Alliance…well, follow the link and make your own judgment. And Rick Warren? Don’t even get me started on this asshole.

The point is not that American Christians urged their Ugandan counterparts to try to institute the death penalty for homosexuality—they didn’t. After much public pressure, Warren has spoken out against the bill, and the Disciple Nations Alliance issued a somewhat lukewarm objection, noting “concerns” but insisting on the right of sovereign nations “to establish their own laws.”

Actually, the real point, is that that silly book of fables I term the ‘wholly bibble’ does indeed advocate (and strongly, too) the death penalty for any and all sexual transgressions.

Yet the ideology underlying the bill comes from American conservatives. It is Americans who have elaborated a vision of homosexuality as a satanic global conspiracy bent on destroying society’s foundations, akin to the Jewish octopus in classic anti-Semitic narratives. According to Warren Throckmorton, an evangelical psychology professor once associated with the ex-gay movement, when Uganda’s anti-gay activists speak about homosexuality, they cite materials by Scott Lively and Paul Cameron, two of the fiercest American opponents of the so-called homosexual agenda.

Since America (and other Western countries) are slowly but assuredly losing interest in the Byzantine and labyrinthine totentanz of the priests, it’s a matter of course that the snake oil peddlers set up their grift in underdeveloped countries.

Religion – dividing people and fanning the fires of ignorance and xenophobia since…well, since the written word.

So let’s get this out in the open. Fuck these people. This attitude of ‘gee whiz, everyone has an opinion, why be so intolerant’ is just a blind eye turned to the nutcases who foster these horrors. In the case of American fuckagelicals, it obviously severely (and horribly) impacts some poor gay folks in Uganda whose only crime is that they prefer someone of their gender. And as long as the American culture brownnoses these crazy ass fairy beggars the way it does, there will be more tragedies, not less.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny - Blazing Saddles

2011-05-10T18:37:00.000-07:00

Truly a classic in every sense of the word.

Enjoy.

The Madness Of Muslim–Even Female Children Are Not Safe…

2011-05-08T00:12:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Wrapped in the frenzied throes of religious stupidity, another girl child suffers. The story that follows is horrifying:

Only 14, Bangladeshi girl charged with adultery was lashed to death

Shariatpur, Bangladesh (CNN) -- Hena Akhter's last words to her mother proclaimed her innocence. But it was too late to save the 14-year-old girl.

Her fellow villagers in Bangladesh's Shariatpur district had already passed harsh judgment on her. Guilty, they said, of having an affair with a married man. The imam from the local mosque ordered the fatwa, or religious ruling, and the punishment: 101 lashes delivered swiftly, deliberately in public.

Hena dropped after 70.

Bloodied and bruised, she was taken to hospital, where she died a week later.

Amazingly, an initial autopsy report cited no injuries and deemed her death a suicide. Hena's family insisted her body be exhumed. They wanted the world to know what really happened to their daughter.

Islam is, of course, a hastily cobbled bit of manure stolen from Judaism, so it is no wonder that the misogyny came along with the compost. What’s even more inequitable, is this:

Hena's family hailed from rural Shariatpur, crisscrossed by murky rivers that lend waters to rice paddies and lush vegetable fields.

Hena was the youngest of five children born to Darbesh Khan, a day laborer, and his wife, Aklima Begum. They shared a hut made from corrugated tin and decaying wood and led a simple life that was suddenly marred a year ago with the return of Hena's cousin Mahbub Khan.

Pissing on the poor? Oh sure, Islam sure does inspire charity – but only if you’re wealthy.

Mahbub Khan came back to Shariatpur from a stint working in Malaysia. His son was Hena's age and the two were in seventh grade together.

Khan eyed Hena and began harassing her on her way to school and back, said Hena's father. He complained to the elders who run the village about his nephew, three times Hena's age.

Yes, this is way more than ‘boys-will-be-boys’ behavior. It’s a huge red flag, at least in civilized countries.

The elders admonished Mahbub Khan and ordered him to pay $1,000 in fines to Hena's family. But Mahbub was Darbesh's older brother's son and Darbesh was asked to let the matter fade.

Predictably, it went south very quickly.

Many months later on a winter night, as Hena's sister Alya told it, Hena was walking from her room to an outdoor toilet when Mahbub Khan gagged her with cloth, forced her behind nearby shrubbery and beat and raped her.

Mahbub is quite obviously a sexual predator.It gets worse, fast.

Hena struggled to escape, Alya told CNN. Mahbub Khan's wife heard Hena's muffled screams and when she found Hena with her husband, she dragged the teenage girl back to her hut, beat her and trampled her on the floor.

In a culture that sanctifies men and spits on women, this is all to common.

The next day, the village elders met to discuss the case at Mahbub Khan's house, Alya said. The imam pronounced his fatwa. Khan and Hena were found guilty of an illicit relationship. Her punishment under sharia or Islamic law was 101 lashes; his 201.

This imam should be shot.

Mahbub Khan managed to escape after the first few lashes.

And then he bolts? Charming. Wouldn’t mind spending a few hours in a room with ‘Bub Khan.

Darbesh Khan and Aklima Begum had no choice but to mind the imam's order. They watched as the whip broke the skin of their youngest child and she fell unconscious to the ground.

"What happened to Hena is unfortunate and we all have to be ashamed that we couldn't save her life," said Sultana Kamal, who heads the rights organization Ain o Shalish Kendro.

What most of these folks don’t realize, is that they’re simply enabling the crazies with their obnoxious superstition.

Bangladesh is considered a democratic and moderate Muslim country, and national law forbids the practice of sharia. But activist and journalist Shoaib Choudhury, who documents such cases, said sharia is still very much in use in villages and towns aided by the lack of education and strong judicial systems.

The Supreme Court also outlawed fatwas a decade ago, but human rights monitors have documented more than 500 cases of women in those 10 years who were punished through a religious ruling. And few who have issued such rulings have been charged.

They should probably get right on that shit, but accommodationists are everywhere, in every country it seems. The US alone teems with millions of them.

The government needs to enact a specific law to deal with such perpetrators responsible for extrajudicial penalty ~~in the name of Islam~~.
--Sultana Kamal, head of rights organization Ain o Shalish Kendro.

(Strikethrough mine)

Last month, the court asked the government to explain what it had done to stop extrajudicial penalty based on fatwa. It ordered the dissemination of information to all mosques and madrassas, or religious schools, that sharia is illegal in Bangladesh.

I’d be willing to bet this has been done before.

The United Nations estimates that almost half of Bangladeshi women suffer from domestic violence and many also commonly endure rape, beatings, acid attacks and even death because of the country's entrenched patriarchal system.

Oh yeah – the same assholes who tried to pass some ‘bill’ prohibiting attacks on religion, but when crazies hide under the religious umbrella, nobody sees them.

There was some action taken because of the media furor, though:

Monday, the doctors responsible for Hena's first autopsy faced prosecution for what a court called a "false post-mortem report to hide the real cause of Hena's death."

Public outrage sparked by that autopsy report prompted the high court to order the exhumation of Hena's body in February. A second autopsy performed at Dhaka Medical College Hospital revealed Hena had died of internal bleeding and her body bore the marks of severe injuries.

Police are now conducting an investigation and have arrested several people, including Mahbub Khan, in connection with Hena's death.

Normally I’m a pacifistic fellow, but I wouldn’t object to stringing these animals up. And there’s more reason in the following:

Police were guarding Hena's family earlier this month. Darbesh and Aklima feared reprisal for having spoken out against the imam and the village elders.

They had meted out the most severe punishment for their youngest daughter. They could put nothing past them.

Because religion is little more than a boot upon the neck of the poverty-stricken. It is nothing more than the excuse used by the savage to prey upon the weak and the weak-minded. Religion is not the root cause of problems in our world, but rather the flimsy centuries-old excuse used to inflict injury, both mental and physical, the psychotic’s alibi for brutality.

How I yearn for the day that there is no religion. No more excuses, no more free passes. But still that day is far away, and not likely in my lifetime.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny - SNL 'Jizz In My Pants'

2011-05-03T22:20:00.000-07:00

Rude crude and socially unacceptable...
...but funny nonetheless.

I could come up with a number of euphemisms - but I'll leave it to my readers (all 12 of them).
Enjoy.

The OBGYN Exorcist–Just When You Thought You’d Seen It All…

2011-04-30T22:44:00.001-07:00

Cross posted at the Atheist Oasis

(Tip o’ the to the Freethinker for this weirdness…)

Fingers, privates, biscuits and icecream...

THE much-talked about Incredible Happening Church’s “demon banishing” service in Katlehong on Sunday resembled a shoot for a blue movie.

We saw the church leader and self-styled prophet Paseka Motsoeneng insert his fingers into the vaginas of two female congregants as part of a ritual he performed to expel the demons that had allegedly possessed them.

It almost sounds like a misogynist’s bad joke.

Motsoeneng’s unorthodox demon banishing methods, which Sunday World has been advised might constitute indecent assault, left a bitter taste in the mouths of other help-seekers who attended the services.

Sitting on the lap of a female congregant, Motsoeneng placed his hand on the head of a 17 year-old teen, who cannot be identified due to her age, and started praying for her.

Motsoeneng told the congregants her tummy had swelled up because some sorcerers had cast an evil spell on her.

As he was praying for her she collapsed. Motsoeneng then told the teenager, who was lying on her back, to open her legs, which she did.

He then plunged his fingers into her private parts and started moving his fingers inside her vagina.

Hitchens was right: if you’re wearing a vestment, you can get away with anything.

As he was busy with his “healing process”, Motsoeneng ordered her to call him by his nickname, Mboro.

“Say Mboro,” he ordered her.

“Mboro” she said, with a stifled cry.

Wow, the lengths some weirdos will go to…

He was interrupted by a female congregant who brought him a glassful of what looked like ice-cream, which she spoon fed him. He was still sitting on the woman’s lap.

While eating, Motsoeneng again ordered the teenager to call his name, which she did.

See, he got the metaphor wrong. It was supposed to be cake.

He then invited a woman he said was a “medical doctor” and whom he called Zozo to examine the teen.

“This is a qualified doctor who will tell us what the problem is with this woman,” he said.

I’m guessing there wasn’t a lot of security vetting people at this…whatever it was.

By this time a group of female congregants had draped her lower body with what looked like a towel and surrounded her to prevent voyeuristic people from seeing her private parts.

But being fingered by an adult eating ice cream isn’t nasty?

“Dr” Zozo then inserted what she said was pregnancy test apparatus into the girl’s vagina, with Motsoeneng looking on.

“The pregnancy tests came out positive. She is pregnant. I could also feel the limbs of the foetus,” Zozo announced .

Aaannddd there goes Zozo’s credibility, straight down the crapper. If you require any further evidence:

As Zozo was leaving the scene, Motsoeneng screamed: “Zozo, she is bleeding and her tummy has subsided.”

Zozo went back to inspect her before she rushed outside. She then came back wearing gloves and holding a pregnancy test kit.

Can people really be this stupid? (A rhetorical question only.)

She inserted them into the teen’s vagina and took them out.

She announced: “Now the kit shows neither positive nor negative results.”

Why, ‘Doctor Zozo’ could actually go on Oprah with this act. It’s not like Pope-ra has any real medical doctors on her show anyways. I thought you had to pee on a stick for a pregnancy test, not….have that done to you.

Motsoeneng chimed in: “It is because she was sleeping with an animal.”

Motsoeneng then asked the teenager if she was sleeping around with men.

So this guy has the ‘courtesy’ to shield the child’s private parts, but not only does he invade them, he has another adult do so? Yeah, you’re a real prince, Mboro.

There is actually more, but I’m still a little personally traumatized by this arrogant ignorant malarkey. Demons in the 21 century? Hell, any century. The only demon I believe in is Maxwell’s anyways (and that’s only statistically certain). Somebody is using exorcism as a veil to mask their somewhat warped libido? Gee where have we heard that one before? Let’s never mind that modern science has disproved this nonsense on so many multiple occasions it’s enough to make the head spin (not backwards, hopefully).

He’s basically sexually touching children and claiming it an act of ‘gawd’. It beggars belief. Or it should. But when it wears the mantle of divinity, all things are sacred. Even pedophilia.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny - Joe Piscopo Does 'Thriller'

2011-04-26T16:23:00.000-07:00

Decades later, still a riot and a half.

Enjoy.

Allegories Gone Wild - Happy Zombie Day!

2011-04-23T23:34:00.001-07:00

⁵¹ At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook, the rocks split ⁵² and the tombs broke open. The bodies of many holy people who had died were raised to life. ⁵³ They came out of the tombs after Jesus’ resurrection and went into the holy city and appeared to many people. - Matthew 27

“Sweet zombie Jesus!” – Hubert J. Farnsworth, Futurama

“Jesus is not a zombie!” - Special Agent Seeley Booth, Bones

Yes boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen, meine damen und herren, it’s that bizarre time of year again, when the hopeless romantics (and even more hopelessly superstitious) celebrate and embody (pun intended) their thanatophobia by praising an event that by all accounts never happened. Not once. Much of this can be found here,

I recall a lecture I attended some years ago by Richard Carrier, where he pointed out that in ancient Rome, it was a federal offense to rob graveyards, regardless of what culture it occurred in. In fact, it was a capital offense. And yet, oddly, no furor was raised, no task forces dispatched. Sure, it’s an argument from silence, but it’s a pretty powerful one. Seeing as how the Jews took great care and reverence in preparing the deceased, a Jewish grave robbed was likely a huge event – which very easily could’ve sparked a huge riot, both then as well as now.

Really? The entire tale, read objectively, reads like some badly written crazy-ass hallucinogenic fantasy. Don’t even get me started on the inability of four people (who all ‘saw’ the same things) to tell the same tale.

It’s a zombie story. And by ‘zombie’, I mean “the body of a dead person given the semblance of life, but mute and will-less, by a supernatural force, usually for some evil purpose.”

This fascination with the dead coming back to life is understandable. More than a little morbid, too. Who enjoys the loss of a loved one? What wouldn’t any of us give to have those people back? A lot. But my wants and needs won’t circumvent reality. It’s a messed up system, more proof the universe gives neither jot nor tittle if we breathe or hurt or gasp or fuck someone. All the more reason we should take care of each other, not less.

We’ve had legends of zombies dating back as far as ancient Greece (remember Cadmus and the Dragon’s teeth?), Mesopotamia, Sumeria, etc. A zombie by any other name still falls under the definition as given above.

It’s a popular and pervasive meme. I can’t count how many zombie movies I’ve seen (though I haven’t tried yet) – and zombies are almost as ubiquitous as any religious fantasy.

So, for the braver among you – tomorrow (or today, it’s 11:28 PM PDT where I am), if someone says, “Happy Easter” or “Happy Bunny Day!”, respond with “Happy Zombie Day!” And come back and tell us (brief synopsis as possible) how that went exactly. Just stay out of harm’s way (if for instance you were to holler this at say, this bunch, that would likely be highly inadvisable), be sensible and safe with it. Oh, and try not to laugh at their umbrage. It’s tough (I can get away with it), but try to make them think if you can.

Till the next post then.

Tuesday Funny - South Park

2011-04-19T22:45:00.000-07:00

For low-brow knee-slapping entertainment, there's no substitute for South Park.
The parodies are pretty funny. This one's entitled 'Cloverpark'.

Enjoy.

Pakistan–A Country Divided, Not United, By The Madness Of Muslim

2011-04-17T00:15:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

War of holy principles
I'm seeking God's help in your destruction
Slit the throat of heathen man
And let his blood dilute the water
Bury your dead – Slayer, “Jihad”

What bedlam is Islam. Must the world be awash in the blood of innocents before these lunatics are stopped? Will the megalomaniacs, deluded into grandiose fantasies, be allowed to ride roughshod over civilization as the bones of innocents are trampled into shards by their ideological steeds?

Pakistan militants killed 2,500 in 2010, report says

More than 2,500 people were killed in militant attacks in Pakistan in 2010, according to the independent Human Rights Commission of Pakistan (HRCP).

Nearly half of victims were civilians killed in suicide blasts. There were 67 such attacks last year, the group said.

The report also said at least 900 people had been killed in US drone strikes during the same period.

For those of you who are unaware, the US is apparently attacking Pakistan on a regular basis. As horrible as that is, it’s a weak-ass excuse:

The number of people killed by the army is not mentioned, but it estimated to be in the region of 600-700.

Pakistani troops are battling insurgents across the north-west. Many of those it has killed are believed to be militants, but civilian lives have been lost too.

The HRCP is the main human rights watchdog in the country. Its findings are often disputed by the authorities, the BBC's Syed Shoaib Hasan in Karachi says.

The group's findings show a rise in the numbers being killed in Pakistan's conflict.

BBC research published last July suggested 1,713 people had been killed by militants over the preceding 18 months, while 746 people had died in drone attacks during the same period.

Still not a good enough excuse.

'Increasing intolerance'

The HRCP released its data in its annual report on the state of human rights and security in Pakistan between January and December 2010.

"Pakistan's biggest problem continues to be violence carried out militants," HRCP chairman Mehdi Hasan said.

To no one’s great surprise.

"In 2010, 67 suicide attacks were carried out across the country in which 1,169 people were killed," he said. "At least 1,000 of those were civilians."

This scattergun approach indicates that not only are these people crazy, they have piss poor aim too.

Dr Hasan said that in all 2,542 people had been killed in militant attacks in the country last year.

Nobody seems to be able to agree on the numbers, except that it’s well over a thousand.

He said the most glaring example of government oversight had been in Balochistan province, where targeted killings shot up rapidly with 118 people being killed in 2010.

Dr Hasan said the figure was set to increase in 2011, as the government seemed unconcerned about the unravelling of the law and order situation in Balochistan.

Follow the link, and you’ll find that Balochistan has been in constant turmoil due to…drum roll please…religious wars. Can’t even put an exclamation mark on it, anymore. It’s common place.

The HRCP report also spoke about increasing intolerance against religious minorities in the country.

It said 99 members of the Ahmedi (Qadiani) sect had been killed in attacks in 2010, while 64 people had been charged under the country's blasphemy law.

For more on the Ahmedi (Qadiani):

Ahmadiyya (Arabic: أحمدية‎;Urdu: احمدِیہ) is an Islamic religious movement founded in India near the end of the 19th century, originating with the life and teachings of Mirza Ghulam Ahmad (1835–1908), who claimed to have fulfilled the prophecies about the world reformer of the end times, who was to herald the Eschaton as predicted in the traditions of various world religions and bring about the final triumph of Islam as per Islamic prophecy. He claimed that he was the Mujaddid (divine reformer) of the 14th Islamic century, the promised Messiah and Mahdi awaited by Muslims. The adherents of the Ahmadiyya sect are referred to as Ahmadis or Ahmadi Muslims. Ahmadi emphasis lay in the belief that Islam is the final law for humanity as revealed to Muhammad and the necessity of restoring to it its true essence and pristine form, which had been lost through the centuries. Thus, Ahmadis view themselves as leading the revival and peaceful propagation of Islam.The Ahmadis were among the earliest Muslim communities to arrive in Britain and other Western countries.

Mirza Ghulam Ahmad founded the movement on 23 March 1889 and termed it the Ahmadiyya Muslim Jama'at (community), envisioning it to be a revitalisation of Islam. Ahmadis consider themselves Muslims and claim to practice Islam in its pristine form; however, Ahmadiyya views on certain beliefs in Islam have been controversial to mainstream Muslims since the movement’s birth. Many mainstream Muslims do not consider Ahmadis to be Muslims, citing in particular the Ahmadiyya viewpoint on the death and return of Jesus (see Jesus in Islam), the Ahmadiyya concept of Jihad in a peaceful format and the community’s view of the finality of prophethood with particular reference to the interpretation of Qur'an 33:40. In several Islamic countries today Ahmadis have been marginalised by the majority religious community; severe persecution and often systematic oppression have led many Ahmadis to emigrate and settle elsewhere.

And of course, the reason even the crazies think that these people are crazier still:

That the prophecies concerning the second coming of Jesus were metaphorical in nature and not literal, and that Mirza Ghulam Ahmad fulfilled in his person these prophecies and the second advent of Jesus, that he was the promised Mahdi and Messiah.
The continuation of divine revelation. Although the Qur'an is the final message of God for mankind, He continues to communicate with his chosen individuals in the same way he is believed to have done in the past. All of God's attributes are eternal.
That Jesus, contrary to mainstream Islamic belief, was crucified and survived the four hours on the cross. He was later revived from a swoon in the tomb. Ahmadis believe that Jesus died in Kashmir of old age whilst seeking the Lost Tribes of Israel. Jesus’ remains are believed to be entombed in Kashmir under the name Yuz Asaf. Ahmadis believe that Jesus foretold the coming of Muhammad after him, which Christians have misinterpreted.
That Jesus Christ did not bring a new religion or law, i.e., that he was not a law-bearing prophet, but was last in the line of Israelite prophets who appeared within the dispensation of Moses akin to that of David, Solomon, Jeremiah, Isaiah, etc.
That the “Messiah” and the “Imam Mahdi” are the same person, and that it is through his teachings, influence, his prayers and those of his followers that Islam will defeat the Anti-Christ or Dajjal in a period similar to the period of time it took for nascent Christianity to rise (see also: Ahmadiyya relationship with Christianity) and that the Dajjal's power will slowly melt away like the melting of snow, heralding the final victory of Islam and the age of peace.
That the history of religion is cyclic and is renewed every seven millennia. The present cycle from the time of the Biblical Adam is split into seven epochs or ages, parallel to the seven days of the week, with periods for light and darkness. That Mirza Ghulam Ahmad appeared as the Promised Messiah at the sixth epoch heralding the seventh and final age of mankind, as a day in the estimation of God is like a thousand years of man's reckoning.^{[Qur'an 22:47]}^[31] According to Ghulam Ahmad, just as the sixth day of the week is reserved for Jumu'ah (congregational prayers), likewise his age is destined for a global assembling of mankind in which the world is to unite under one universal religion: Islam.
The two Ahmadiyya groups have varying beliefs regarding the finality of the Prophethood of Muhammad. The Ahmadiyya Muslim Community believes that Muhammad brought prophethood to perfection and was the last law-bearing prophet and the apex of man’s spiritual evolution. New prophets can come but they must be subordinate to Muhammad and cannot exceed him in excellence nor alter his teaching or bring any new law or religion. The Lahore Ahmadiyya Movement believes that Muhammad is the last of the prophets and no prophet, new or old, can come after him.

Need I deconstruct this? Nah – res ipsa loquitor. When it boils down to Rodney King’s“can’t we all get along?” refrain – obviously we can’t. We’re trying…but the religious nuts keep flummoxing it up.

How much more evidence does the world require, then? Proof that religion is poison is everywhere, that chasing the afterlife allows the insane to slaughter the innocents, because obviously that great cosmic babysitter in the sky has been and is out indefinitely on an extended break that’s lasted…since time began.

Till the next post, then.

Tuesday Funny - SNL's Seth Meyers 'Really?'

2011-04-12T08:40:00.001-07:00

I've been wending my way through some recent Saturday Night Live episodes on Netflix, and I really quite enjoy the 'Really?!?' segments. I'd go as far as to say, it's the epitome of snark.

Enjoy.

Because The Call Of The Wild Is Louder Than An Ave Maria….

2011-04-09T23:18:00.001-07:00

Cross posted @ the Atheist Oasis

Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumption and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure.
-- Ambrose Bierce, Collected Works (1912), quoted from James A Haught, ed, 2000 Years of Disbelief

But love's the only engine of survival – Leonard Cohen, ‘The Future’

(Hat tip to Krissthesexyatheist)

It’s true – the religious bellow about clamping down on the simplest, most natural behavior. Vastly amusing for folks who aren’t acquainted with the cultural context, but obnoxious for those of us who see this sort of nonsense regularly. And in America, it’s constant. A constant barrage rains down on the average citizen. Religious language permeates (too) many metaphors; the imagery is ubiquitous; and the taboos about criticism are so deeply ingrained, it’s no wonder atheists are blamed for cultural calamities, and shouted down.

Of course, when you read a story like the following, a lack of reverence puts things into perspective quickly:

German theologians call for end to celibacy

BERLIN – University theologians in Germany have called on the Catholic Church to abandon the vow of celibacy for priests, open up the clergy for women and accept gays couples.

Yeah, I’d say you clowns are about a millennia too late.

The 143 professors said the church must implement bold reforms because of "a crisis without precedent" following the discovery of widespread sexual and physical abuses by clergymen a year ago.

Sorry. In my book, almost anything is forgivable. Child molestation is NOT one.

More Christians than ever have turned their backs on the Catholic Church in the past year, they said. "The Church has to understand these signs and move beyond its ossified structures to regain new vitality and credibility."

Said one dinosaur to another, “What’s that big burning thing coming down on us?”

The appeal, published in newspaper Sueddeutsche Zeitung's Friday edition, called on the church's leadership to stop excluding gay couples and remarried Christians.

Oops – there goes another book of the bible. I assume the shellfish and linen stipulations are out too?

"The Church also needs married priests and women holding positions in the clergy," the appeal said — in clear defiance of the Vatican's dogmas.

But Germany's Bishops Conference on Friday cautiously welcomed the appeal, saying it could enhance the ongoing reform discussion, while noting several proposals contradicted the church's principles.

Reform? The Catholic church isn’t in need of reform. That’s like strapping a jet engine to a Model T. It needs to be gone.

"On some issues, the memorandum is in conflict with theological convictions and church regulations that are highly binding," Bishops Conference Secretary Hand Langendoerfer said in a statement.

The appeal — signed by a few Austrian, Swiss and by almost a third of Germany's Catholic university theologians — is a rare challenge to the clergy establishment and the Vatican, because the church has a veto right in appointing theologians at Germany's state-run universities.

Wait – what? Why are there ‘theologians’ in state-run universities?

But the wealthy Catholic Church in the homeland of Pope Benedict XVI sees the number of its followers dwindling, leading to lower proceeds every year, and ever fewer young men choosing to become priests.

Always good news.

Several leading lawmakers from Chancellor Angela Merkel's Christian Democratic Party — among them parliamentary Speaker Nobert Lammert and Education Minister Annette Schavan — last month also appealed to Germany's bishops to fight for the vow of celibacy's abolition, citing "the increasing lack of priests."

You gotta bribe young men into joining by maybe letting them get laid? The phrase ‘control issues’ comes to mind.

The theologians, in turn, said the challenges are already obvious for a long time, but there are still no church reforms within sight.

A common refrain that has lasted two millennia.

"The disturbance of open dialogue without any taboos does not go well with everybody, especially when there's a papal visit upcoming," the theologians said, referring to Benedict's planned visit in September.

They said that in stereo? Truer words have never been spoken, especially by theologians.

The professors also called for a more democratic and less centralized church, including giving the faithful a say in appointing their priests and bishops. "What can be decided locally, should be decided there," the appeal said.

Centuries of trying to suppress and chain a vital urge that drives humanity, and what do we get? Child molesters. Res ipsa loquitor.

I believe the end is coming, folks. That great shambling blind anachronism is falling to its knees, not in supplication, but in fatigue. The only reform needed is that our species stop paying homage and respect to the shamans and witch-doctors. We’ve outgrown them. At least, some of us have. We’re just waiting for the rest to catch up.

Till the next post, then.

Wednesday Funny - A MIghty Wind

2011-04-06T10:39:00.000-07:00

I was watching this film last night, and the following scene is very nearly a rib-buckler:

Favorite line of all time; "Human kind is simply materialized color operating on the 49th vibration."
Highly recommended. Not only vastly funny, but packed to the rafters with some very cool music.
Enjoy.